2 comments about Franklin and Lucy: President Roosevelt, Mrs. Rutherfurd, and the Other Remarkable Women in His Life.

1. Other bibliophiles may recognize this situation: there comes a point in some books when you just have to accept the fact that you are not going to bed until you finish. I can count on my fingers the number of times that has happened to me. Obviously different books for different people but FDR, along with Churchill, are stellar examples of leaders to me and I enjoy learning more about them.
   
   I have read several other books by Joseph Persico, most notably Roosevelt's Secret War. The content of Franklin and Lucy was almost entirely new to me. I came away with a totally different, much more intimate, portrait of Franklin and Eleanor. I have to admit I have not read much biographical information on either of them. I now await several biographies of both Roosevelts.
   
   Franklin and Lucy studies the women in his life, from his mother Sara to Eleanor, Lucy Rutherford, Missy LeHand and various other cousins and admirers. The most in-depth background information is on Eleanor, Sara and Lucy - the three women who had the most profound effect on FDR. Both Sara and Eleanor were products of the Victorian era. Sara, being older, was never able to rise above the Victorian mores of her time and social set. As both Sara and Franklin almost perished during his birth, she never had another child and Franklin was doted on as a companion, one she loathed to relinquish, and treated as her obedient son even when he occupied the White House. It seems apparent that this early pattern gave Franklin the need he always seemed to have for feminine approval and admiration.
   
   At the turn of the century the "400" more or less ruled society, industry and government. Their standards for acceptance were shallow, including good looks, inherited wealth, correct breeding etc. It was frowned upon in this group to work hard for grades in school which somewhat explains FDR's rather poor showing as a "C" student.
   
   Sara had inherited wealth as well as the standards of her time and, as FDR was an only child, she spoiled him badly. Her wealth provided him with residences beginning with a 'Gold Coast' apartment at Harvard, decorated by her, to side by side townhouses after his marriage to Eleanor. Sara appears to have been not particularly intelligent or imaginative. When she purchased the side by side housing arrangement she had doors cut between the two residences, allowing her to 'pop in' at will. Thus the stage was set for a battle of wills that Eleanor was ill-equipped to win. Apparently Sara was never able to see the wrongness of her control over both Eleanor and Franklin. She was also a bad third court of appeal when the children began to grow up. Their parents might decide one thing but they could turn to Granny who would immediately favor them with a happier outcome. Thus she undermined the parenting of both Eleanor and Franklin.
   
   Eleanor was also a product of Victorian mores albeit in a far more draconian way than Sara. She, however, was a more intelligent and curious woman than her mother-in-law. Eleanor was orphaned at an early age and sent with her brother to live with her grandmother. Her childhood was Dickensian to say the least. Eleanor was not blessed with beauty and, in a family known for attractive women, she was cruelly reminded of her uselessness by everyone from her mother to cousin Alice. I have never seen the use of these sort of people but the deliberate cruelty to one of their own family is despicable. Young women of Eleanor's generation learned nothing of sex or sexuality and to quote one of her cousins "The 'purebred' New England woman, when she finally married, knew her duty, lay on her bed, and murmured to herself, as the husband approached, 'for God, for country and for Yale.'" Such was the likely state of Eleanor's knowledge as she approached the marriage bed. Everyone knows how Eleanor subsequently turned out. Knowing the deprivations of her childhood and her lack of self esteem it is easy to understand why she became a champion of so many underdogs. Eleanor as she matured was able to step away from the prejudices of her time - be they religious, racial, gender or class. What is not commonly known is the immediate impetus for her maturity. This lies in the story of Lucy Rutherford and Franklin's affair which she discovered accidentally in 1918.
   
   Lucy was another Victorian era child whose monetary fortune did not fare as well as Eleanor and Franklin's. Descended from wealth, Lucy's worthless parents had impoverished themselves by the time she was a young woman. Forced to do something to keep a roof over their heads, Lucy took a job as Eleanor's secretary. The rest is history and you should read the book to find out the details. I had never heard of Lucy Rutherford prior to this book and, after the affair was discovered, it was assumed she left FDR's life. Letters recently discovered by some of her descendants have shown this to be untrue and were the impetus for the book. Lucy was an necessary part of FDR's life up until the moment of his death. She was at his side, rather than Eleanor, when that moment came.
   
   Persico does an excellent job of providing the information which allows you to see how Sara's early influence on Franklin made it always essential that he have women around to listen to and admire him; women who did not demand anything of him. Eleanor was a dynamo and unable to do this. Rather, she was always asking things of him - altruistic things - but demanding nonetheless. After he became President, Eleanor was unable to appreciate that, in order to cope with the pressures he was handling, he sometimes just needed a short time to do nothing. That was when Eleanor would descend on him with projects. All this made his time with Lucy the more precious. Lucy had the gift of gracious listening so necessary to a man leading his country into a devastating war. During those years she was more essential than ever to FDR.
   
   Persico makes a few comments on the morality of FDR's liaisons but, like me, he is not judgmental. He quotes Arthur Schlesinger, Jr. at the end of the book (If Lucy Mercer) "in any way helped Franklin Roosevelt sustain the frightful burdens of leadership in the second world war, the nation has good reason to be grateful to her." I certainly am. I am grateful to Joseph Persico as well for writing such a compelling book. It will not be published until the end of this month (April). If you are a history fan you will want to read this one.



2. This biography of Franklin D. Roosevelt was thoroughly engaging. I'm no historian, and have no idea if Joseph Persico has broken new ground in historical scholarship with this book. He has produced an eminently readable biography of one of our great leaders, viewed from the perspective of his relationships with several remarkable women.
   
   FDR was the over-protected only son of a dominating mother, born into wealth and privilege. The handsome young Franklin surprised almost everyone by choosing to marry his plain and awkward cousin Eleanor. He served the Wilson Administration as Undersecretary of the Navy during WWI, when the 36 year old husband and father of five fell in love with the beautiful Miss Lucy Mercer, his wife's social secretary.
   
   Eleanor discovered the affair and it changed her world forever, although the marriage survived. Despite his promises to Eleanor FDR did not cut off all communications with Lucy, who married a wealthy widower and by all accounts was a devoted and loving wife, stepmother, and mother.
   
   I think that in some ways the title is less accurate than the subtitle, because Lucy Mercer Rutherfurd remains a more shadowy figure in this book than most of the other remarkable women in FDR's closest circle. Persico portrays Lucy as possessing from first to last a nearly mystical aura, an ability to quietly charm everyone she met, and a depth of character. There was clearly a deep and lifelong connection between Lucy and FDR.
   
   Persico brings compassion and respect to all the characters here: the complex FDR, his equally complex wife Eleanor, his beautiful and dominant mother Sara, and the other women who moved in and out of his orbit including Lucy, FDR's devoted aide Missy LeHand, his daughter Anna, and his cousins Daisy and Polly. When I reached the end of this book I felt I not only knew more about FDR and Eleanor, but had come to know a handful of other women who shared FDR's journey through this world.

2 comments about American Eve.

1. I've been waiting eons for this book to be published, and it was 10 years in the making.
   
   Uruburu's look at the life and tragedy of Evelyn Nesbit is a fascinating page-turner that finally places Nesbit in her correct time period. Although she looks modern, she was a girl trapped and exploited by the standards of her time. Her beauty lifted her into the high life of 1900s New York City, but it also led her down a tragic path of madness and murder.
   
   Although the previous reviewer is correct that the term "It Girl" didn't come into play until Clara Bow in the 1920s, author Uruburu states that Nesbit was the "It Girl" of the turn of the last century, and I agree. Nesbit's life and the 1906 murder of Stanford White still fascinate, and this is one of the best books on the subject.



2. In the first years of the 20th century, one of the most famous women in America was a teenager, Evelyn Nesbit, a model for artists and photographers and New York showgirl. She was ubiquitous in advertisements and magazines, and had a kind of innocent beauty that also possessed a measure of sophistication. She was courted by many stage-door millionaires, but it was Stanford White, renowned architect, who made her his mistress. Later she would marry an unbalanced millionaire, Harry K. Thaw of Pittsburgh, who would learn that White spoiled his child-bride and during the summer of 1906, in the rooftop theater of Madison Square Garden, a building White designed, Thaw would murder White and cast Nesbit as the focal point of the first American trial that would become a media circus.
   
   Nesbit's story, and the tale of murder and insanity that accompanies it, is brilliantly told in Paula Uruburu's book American Eve: Evelyn Nesbit, Stanford White, The Birth of the "It" Girl, and the Crime of the Century. While the appelation It Girl is incorrect (that was Clara Bow some twenty years later), Nesbit was certainly the first model to gain national attention. Her humble upbringing from a Pittsburgh suburb to full-time model at age 14 is layed out in scrupulous detail, as is her seduction by White and courtship with the mad Harry. What Uruburu seems most keen on doing here is setting the record straight--Nesbit was vilified by many in the press at the time of the murder and trial. As Uruburu points out, she was more sinned against than sinning, a girl who was neglected by her mother and allowed to be exploited by the rapacious men of the age. Uruburu's book is Evelyn's story, told largely from her viewpoint (making large use of Evelyn's two memoirs) and by the end of the book it is clear that she was a victim of circumstance and her own beauty.
   
   The book is carefully researched, with as much detail as the reader would want without being bogged down in too many facts and figures. The chapters describing White's seduction and subsequent deflowering of Evelyn read partly as history, partly as erotic novel, with the reader's senses saturated to overflowing. The chapter depicting the shooting is as tense and exciting as a thriller, and the trial (there were actually two) is rendered in novelistic fashion, with the emotions on display, rather than laborious recitations of transcripts.
   
   Perhaps the best thing about the book is the style of writing. This is no dry academic tome, nor is it a non-fiction novel. It is biography and history, but with a delightfully mordant drollery. Uruburu never passes up a chance to inject levity into the proceedings, whether it be referring to a low-rent lawyer's reputation being as checkered as his suit, or Harry Thaw's sisters looking like Harry in fright wigs. She also allows frequent glimpses of what was going on in the first decade of the 1900s, interspersing other headlines of the day in context, whether they be the assassination of President McKinley or the electrocution of Topsy the elephant.
   
   Anyone having an interest in true-crime, sensational trials, a history of the sexual mores of America, or the time period when the horse and buggy was giving way to the automobile would be advised to read this book. You will learn a lot--that the Thaw trial was the first to require a jury to be sequestered, that the term "sob sister", referring to women journalists covering the trial, was coined in this instance, and that on the same day Thaw shot White, a hippo at the Central Park Zoo passed on due to heat prostration. This book is as tasty as a snack and fulfilling as a meal.

5 comments about My Dearest Friend: Letters of Abigail and John Adams.

1. I must shamefully admit that prior to the renewed interest in John Adams with the recent miniseries, I really had only a general knowledge of his role and importance in the founding of our country. This book gives a private, personal and wonderful view of the strength,deep,abiding love of this first family. I could not put it down & would highly recommend it to anyone.



2. If you are a history buff or just a little interested in the history of our nation you will love this book. The letters exchanged between John and Abigail Adams are wonderful. Abigail was definitely John's rock. She kept him focused and steady. John was a very passionate man in his beliefs and at times would become a tyrant trying to convince people that his way of thnking was the only way to think. Thank goodness he had Abigail as he ran everything by her to see how she thought the people would react to his perception. Abigail would let him know when he needed to press an issue or just be quiet and let it happen on its own. Besides being lovers as husband and wife they were truly best friends. An inspirational read.



3. I started reading this while watching the John Adams HBO mini series. I didn't finish the book until after I had seen all 7 episodes. It was interesting to read their correspondence and realize how much of an asset Abigail was to John. If you enjoy reading letters, you will enjoy this book. The author inserts commentary prior to a particular time frame of letters in order for you to understand the tenor and specifics of the letters that follow. I enjoyed it.



4. This book is a wonderful adjunct to the HBO series and David Mc Cullough's brilliant book.."John Adams". I have never been devoted to our American history, preferring instead Ancient cultures. I see what I have missed and vow to read more about the brave and devoted men and women who, indeed ,created our country. The love affair between John and Abigail seemed to provide the great man, as well as Thomas Jefferson, with the strength and comfort that spurred them on. Bravo!!



5. My Dearest Friend: Letters of Abigail and John Adams
   
   Well written

5 comments about Celebrity Detox: (The Fame Game).

1. Rosie puts herself out there for all of us, and I found that I could relate to many of her feelings. Reading about her sad childhood made me want to give her a hug, and I feel that the media has given her a raw deal all the way around. I was a big fan of her talk show; there she always had to put on a happy face for the audience. In this book, the mask comes off and she shows her vulnerable side, her life with Kelly and their kids, and the struggle she went through on "The View". Rosie, I still think you rock! This book is a very candid look inside her life.



2. My interest in picking up O'Donnell's book--interest being a relative word--was merely to see if A) O'Donnell in her own words is really as vile as her rhetoric and feuds with seemingly everyone indicate and B) if so, to know what one of America's domestic enemies thinks. After "reading" this book--one cannot read it per se because it's written in primer language and has the vocabulary and grammar of an elementary school kid--I can honestly assert Trump was absolutely, 100% right!!!! O'Donnell's a bully, self-destructive, paranoid, self-righteous, elitist, and prone to conspiracy theories 24/7. It's fair to say I was going in to this book with prejudices, but the worst implication is that all of them were borne out by O'Donnell's own, at times, scary trends of thought.
   
   As I alluded to, the presentation of Celebrity Detox is aggravatingly simple-minded: the print is for four-year-olds, the writing and word choice is abnormally basic, and the "intellect" of O'Donnell as her written word represents it is really shameful. She probably didn't go to college, and it egregiously shows.
   
   Celebrity Detox, to O'Donnell, is the process in which a quasi-celebrity like her readjusts to "normal" life after the blinding glare and sensationalized existence of being in the spotlight for a certain time. The ordeal with O'Donnell's take on detoxing from this celebrity is that it oftentimes strays into the utter, elitist, high-minded conceptualization which the normal, average American just can't and shouldn't relate to. For instance, O'Donnell has the unmitigated gall to grieve about missing being with her kids--she's g*y, so most of her kids are adopted; her marriage was voided by California's SC and is a sham--while having worked on her successful talk show! Many working Americans are familiar with this phenomenon: it's called balancing work and family life, yet to elitists like O'Donnell, this comes apparently as an unreasonable shock.
   
   Also discomforting is reading O'Donnell's mortifying revelations about how stunted she is in her personal development as a result of being a quasi-celebrity. We all know celebrities are spoilt and can't do much of anything for themselves, yet O'Donnell's admission takes the cake. She actually has the audacious nerve to blame her career success as the culprit for why she apparently can't park a car properly. That's right; as shameful as this would be to admit were it a normal person, O'Donnell seems to sinisterly revel in admitting that she can't even park an automobile properly!!!! This is just another, flagrant example of the inequity that exists between the visibility/influence of celebrities and their impotence and ineptitude.
   
   O'Donnell also reveals that she's estranged from average Americans by her elitist worship of fellow lib celebrities like Barbra Streisand. The seemingly unrelenting pages she devotes to Streisand worship is really a sickness; one would believe that Streisand were God the way O'Donnell keeps exaggeratedly vaunting her. Implicating O'Donnell as being out of touch with average Americans is the fact that she arrogantly goes on about how she created a documentary, by following Streisand from tour stop to tour stop, about Streisand's alleged inspiration to many people. However, only trivial/elitist people would really believe that Streisand was an object worthy of adoration when there are so many better, female role models out there. Condoleeza Rice (1st woman Secretary of State), Laura Bush (AIDS work, librarian), and Lynne Cheney (children's author, US historian) easily trump Babs.
   
   In one passage in the book, O'Donnell really revolts people by confessing that she used to take a bat to her fingers and hands and break her bones!!!! If this isn't further, corroborative proof of celebrities being poisonous and unbalanced in general, then nothing is proof enough.
   
   The most egregious offense in O'Donnell's alleged, tell-all book is her glaring and cowardly omission of confessing what an anti-American, treasonous enemy-emboldener she is!!!! From her wild accusations on the View, we all know O'Donnell is a 911 "Truther" (precipitously believing the US attacked itself), humanizes terrorists (infamously uttering that terrorists are moms and dads too!), and accuses the US military of killing Iraqi civilians!!!! However, she dastardly dodges addressing any of these provocative allegations which rightly got her terminated from the View.
   
   O'Donnell also indulges in a martyr complex when she imagines herself having been victimized by Trump. The intellectually honest human realizes that Trump did a noble thing by showing Christian-type forgiveness to the young woman who was in his pageant, yet O'Donnell instigated character *ss*ssination on him. When Trump defensibly fought back, O'Donnell's misdirected attitude was that SHE was the one attacked.
   
   Additionally, O'Donnell also divulges how double-dealing her untrustworthy character is as she really derogates Barbara Walters excessively. This is particularly treasonous when she spends the beginning of the book singing Walters' praises...only to tear her down throughout the book. Celebrity Detox is instructive only in that it enforces much of what the Silent Majority (real, normal Americans) rightly thinks of celebrities: they're liberal and unstable and disgusting.



3. As someone who reads far too many celeb memoirs, I am a pretty easy sell. I've been known to read memoirs -- in one seating -- by actresses whose work I'm only vaguely familiar with. I'm a bit of a pop culture junkie and a memoir fiend, so it doesn't take much to get my interest.
   
   That said, "Celebrity Detox" is one of the weakest efforts I've ever seen in the genre. It reads like something thrown together late on a Sunday night with a Monday morning deadline looming. Rosie takes on a topic -- toxic fame -- and proceeds to say nothing most people don't already know. "Most of show biz is built on an illusion." Seriously? I think people who can't locate New York City on a map know that. There are also "chapters" that are just reprints of Rosie's blogs. (I could do without the lack of caps. Who does she think she is, e e cummings?) And then there is the bizarre chapter in which Rosie talks about riding her skateboard to Wells Fargo for a financial session because her account has been overdrawn too many times. What does that have to do with her thesis? That celebs are relatable? That fame isn't always about wealth? It is typical of the digressive, pointless rambling of this book.
   
   If you insist on reading this, I recommend skimming to that last third, where things heat up a bit. Rosie takes on Barbara Walters and Rosie's tenure at "The View," and her insights are somewhat interesting. That said, she doesn't talk much about Elisabeth Hasselbeck, her famous sparring partner. If that was too raw for her to take on, she might have waited a while to write this book. "Celeb Detox 2"... don't even think about it!



4. If you read her blog and watched the View then there is really no reason to read this. I found it boring and predictable.



5. Great easy read. Rosie tells all we need to know about what fame actually does to a person and what also happens when you do not play the game.

5 comments about The Year of Magical Thinking.

1. First, let me say I am not a fan of Joan Didion's writing, thus the three stars instead of four. It is a well told story and the hurt comes through. It is simply cumbersome for the mind to digest. I don't know, maybe it is over-written or too thought out...I just didn't feel her actual words coming through. Worth reading.



2. As a lover of creative nonfiction, I was attracted to this book for its popularity and rave reviews--touching, beautiful, even magical. At the risk of being insensitive to the material therein, I found it dull. Didion, whose essays I love (check out: "On Keeping A Notebook") never went below the surface. Remaining in the action of the events, revisiting them painfully again and again, this was more a snapshot of her life, than a rumination on it. So if you want a snapshot, you'll love it.



3. I didn't like it either, until I realized it's not a book about grief, it's a book about guilt.
   
   See, Joan Didion is a psychopath who poisons her husband with blended scotch - partially because he was becoming suspicious of their daughter's mysterious illness, but mainly because it was all part of her devious plan.
   
   Joan had inflicted a terrible illness upon her young daughter through the use of rare and vicious biting insects that she had collected during her many exotic vacations. She originally conceives of the plan to slowly kill her daughter when she meets her future son-in-law and immediately becomes infatuated with him. She infects her daughter with a debilitating illness that would necessitate the two of them (Joan and the Son-in-law) spending a lot of time together, so that eventually he would fall in love with her, and they would fly to Hawaii for lunches and live in the Beverly Wilshire Hotel for the rest of their lives.
   
   I can't wait for the movie!



4. As a priest and someone who deals with death and grieving much too often, Ms. Didion captures the process of sudden death and grieving with such clarity. Certainly everyone grieves at the own rate and differently, but there are common threads which she captures so well. From the moment of her husbands death through the "year of magical thinking" she puts into words, what people who have lost loved ones have felt.
   
   I once asked a doctor to describe why certain deseases kill people and she suggested the book, "How We Die", which Didion, by the way, quotes in here book. What How We Die is to the non-physician, this book is to the those who have never grieved as well as a capturing of the saga to thsoe who have.



5. "The Year of Magical Thinking" is as honest and emotionally forth-right a book as I have read in recent years. If you have any interest in reading an intelligent, raw, researched, intimate portrait of death and grief, this book is highly recommended. Didion is a stellar writer, and she hardly fails when pointing the examining lens on herself.
   
   That said, I must agree with reviewers who comment that this book is a little less than "engaging," that we never quite get as deep as we'd like in to it all. However, if you are dealing with grief or loss, I promise you you will be able to relate to her experiences throughout, and it will be a healing, while emotionally challenging, process of reading. Unfortunately, Joan's own perspective seems to handicap the creativity she might have brought to this account. I dread for this to sound accusatory to Joan, but her recounting seems very empiric at times, and at times she seems very distant from her own life. Of course, this is one manifestation of grief (the distancing, the objectifying, the trying-to-make-rationally-clear), so in this manner, you could call this short-fall rather a success. By the title, I expected more exploration in to her magical thinking, but what the reader seems finally left with is Joan's mature attempts at reintroducing rationality in to her life, often forcibly so. Perhaps this was her aim.
   
   I notice I've written in the margins, "Style is ordinary, blatantly frightening." I think by this I mean it must have been the most difficult thing she's written in her whole career, as it surely must have been. She doesn't try to dazzle and this prose is not concocted. She doesn't craft a seamless narrative here, or offer us logical sequences even. What she does craft is a portrait of emergency, loss, grief, and of hesitant, slow acceptance and release, a portrait that can only be taken as a whole and as reflection on these themes which we all must inevitably encounter as beings-in-the-world.
   
   Aside from these minor comments, this book is a joy to read. We see her struggling to understand both the medical and philosophical aspects of death and dying. She shares with us quotes from those of the past who have reflected on death, and intertwines their realizations with her own. We find her confronting the meaninglessness, and she does so eloquently, painfully, truthfully. It doesn't seem like she did much editing in this work (of course I could be wrong). What seems like chronology is really a constant returning to December 30th and the working out of its details in the subsequent days. She is rightfully bitter at John and herself for mistakes made and it is heart-warming to hear her share these details of such an obviously intimate relationship. We see how John lives on in her mind as a powerful and inspiring force, while retaining his own mysteries, his own magical intuitions on his fate, she admits she may never fully understand. All of this wrapped with a subtle rejection of the ways in which society puts off the dead, mishandles the sick, and all but neglects the care-takers who must live on afterwards. Sadly, Joan shows us the image of a lonely woman who lost a companion she hardly knows how to define her self without, set in a world hardly prepared to heal her injured self.
   
   Joan says, "I realize as I write this that I do not want to finish this account" or "This was demented, but so was I" or "But I was not thinking from my rational mind." These are examples of passages that the reader, by that point, has already intuited for himself, yet welcomes in recognition with the author. We know in our own heart that we must read these realizations because of the time and contemplation set forth in them by Joan's own realizing and admitting--we want to hear her say them. She repeats many themes throughout, situating her life's story in the human narrative of grief, showing us what helped her, offering herself up for us.
   
   Echoing Lev Grossman, commenting on the back cover, "An act of consummate literary bravery...Didion shows us what she has lost." Show us she does, and we are all the richer and healthier for her admonitions. We owe Joan one.

5 comments about The Center Cannot Hold: My Journey Through Madness.

1. This was a great story of one womans struggle with coming to terms with mental illness and trying to maintain her life. It was both encouraging that she was able to finally overcome the illness to create a successful career and personal life, and at the same time discouraging that it took her over 15 years of struggle and denial to do so.



2. I was so moved by Dr. Saks story, I couldn't put this book down. She is so brave to write her life's story and risk so much. Despite all her challenges, she is extremely accomplished as well as hopeful, courageous, honest, resilient, sensitive and generous. She exposes the mental health system in this country and compares it to England's. Every word in the book is meaningful. Dr Saks tells the story in a clear, precise, and simple to understand way. I found Elyn an inspirational role model. I have recommended this book to many relatives and friends. I even bought it as a gift for close relatives. I hope one day to meet her.



3. It is impossible to overpraise this book, which is the only book I know of that takes you deep into the torments of the schizophrenic mind. What's astonishing about it is simply that Elyn Saks wrote it...and wrote it so engagingly and compelling. It staggers the imagination that she has achieved what she has given the colossal difficulties presented by her illness. There have been lots of books, as Saks points out near the end of hers, about mental illness, especially by mentally ill patients, but most of these have been by depressives and bipolar patients. These are mood disorders, but schizophrenia, as she so powerfully shows us, is a thought disorder which impairs the cognitive abilities of the brain and which substitutes a delusional world for the "reality" most of us experience. Damn I hope more and more people read this so that we might better understand the dark recesses of madness that threaten to engulf those afflicted with this terrible illness. This book is one for the ages. It belongs on the shelf of anyone interested in the capabilities of the human mind.



4. This book is absolutely excellent to get a good "inside" view of what it is like to experience the confusion and depth of schizophrenia. Added to its value is the fact that the author, who is shizophrenic, is an accomplished author in professional journals, and has earned a law degree at a prestigious university and an advanced degree in psychology as well! I admire her courage and willingness to speak out and share her personal experiences that so many have stigmatized. Kudos!



5. When I was a Medical Student, I met patients with variety of psychiatric disorders. This book has given me perspective that I didn't get then. I am really glad I read this book.
   
   I wish the author had made the book even more personal with family pictures or pictures from her childhood.

5 comments about Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood.

1. I've never read a graphic novel until this book. I first learned about this book after reading the amazing reviews for the movie version of this book. I always make it a point to read the novel before seeing any movie so decided to pick this up. Having read quite a few fiction and history novels on post-WWII Iran(including Septembers of Shiraz recently), this was a topic that highly interests me.
   
   Last night I started this book and couldn't put it down until I was done. It is a captivating and immersive experience and I just ordered "Persepolis 2" and can't wait to read it as soon as it arrives from amazon. I loved the simplicity of this novel. The dialogue and story telling perfectly captures an adolescent Marjane in Iran through the crumbling of Shah Reza Pahlavi's regime and the initial promise and subsequent reality of the Islamic revolution. Satrapi effortlessly captures all of the emotions that she undoubtedly went through during these times, both in word and in picture. While I was somewhat skeptical about the illustrations, they once again added an additional layer of context and dimension that took this from a great book to an extraordinary book.
   
   If you've never thought of reading a graphic novel, do yourself a favor. Buy this book and enjoy -- it is a true treasure.



2. Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood and Persepolis 2: The Story of a Return by Marjane Satrapi are very well written novels that effectively describe the author's experiences while growing up in Iran during the Iranian Revolution, the Iran-Iraq War, as well as many other historical events. I really enjoyed reading Satrapi's childhood account of such dramatic events in Iranian history, and the comic book format made the memoirs even more enjoyable reads. The innocent and sometimes ignorant perspective of a child is a very positive way of broadcasting such terrible and negatively viewed events in a way that everyone can understand them. Satrapi definitely does an excellent job of enticing her audience while also giving them an accurate and perhaps new way of looking at history.
   I would recommend Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood and Persepolis 2: The Story of a Return to anyone, whether they are students wanting to learn more about historical events in the Middle East, westerners who do not comprehend the many struggles Iran has faced, or just an average person looking for a dramatic yet accurate read. The historical events that are depicted within these graphic novels are very easily viewed in the eyes of such a mischievous and driven child, and her account is one that anyone can associate with and learn from. Despite the apprehensive atmosphere created by the mounted unsettlement of Marji and her family as well as the captivating and simple drawings that accompany the text, Marji is always able to demonstrate great strength within her family, and becomes fully aware of the perils of her country through trial and error, just as the reader does when they witness the overwhelmingly inspiring account of a little girl growing up during such a divisive point in history. After reading such a powerful message, one comes away with not only a greater view of historical events of the world, but also has a greater respect for all storytellers, no matter how much of a minority they may appear to be.



3. Please take the time to read this striking memoir and its sequel, Persepolis 2. The language is straightforward, as is the graphic style. Satrapi's very personal story speaks to both the difficulties of living in a straight-laced, dogmatically rigid society, and the many different stories and perspectives of those who live there. Iran is often portrayed in a reductionist manner in the West, and a close reading of these books serves to broaden and deepen our understanding.
   
   Additionally, Satrapi is currently near the end of a speaking tour in the U.S. IF you have the opportunity to hear her speak, take advantage of it. She is a cogent and compassionate speaker who will further deepen your understanding of the Iranian people.



4. "Persepolis" is a great read. In less than two hours, you'll know more about Iranian history than you probably ever did. I, for one, felt positively ignorant as I learned of the Shah, the Islamic revolution, the Communist sympathizers... all told through the eyes of a teenage girl who thinks she is a prophet. The book is informative, fun, and an easy read. It will dispel many stereotypes without resorting to political correctness. I'm very glad I opted for the book over the movie version currently in theaters. I'm often bored by animation, but the graphic novel is interactive and the story flows nicely. Read it... you won't regret it.



5. I read Persepolis the day it arrived from the bookstore. I sat down with a cup of coffee, some French downtempo, and proceeded to inhale the entire book, cover-to-cover, in a little over two hours. I reread it recently, and this time prefaced my reading with light research. I checked out an interview with Asia Source, took in a few literary reviews, and brushed up on the history of the ancient city of Persepolis, for which the novel's title is based. I tried to piece together the historical context of the book with the artistic process that inspired the author to write such heady material into a graphic novel.
   
   Let me preface by saying I don't think heady material is too good for graphic novels. I've read a few of these in the last few years -- this and Blankets are notable. I find graphic novels take the best of literature and film, combining them for an eloquent, visually striking experience. The use of light and dark as metaphor is the most compelling, and Persepolis uses this often, and best. The stark, unforgiving illustrations appear at once so bleak and in an instant so bright. In one frame the thick black gashes are the dark bags beneath a dead demonstrators vacant eyes, and in the next frame are innocent and child-like, a squiggling and unsteady black line framing a young Marji's equally gleeful, cherub face.
   
   Reading around I noticed this technique, both jarring and "immature", nearly turned off many a potential reader, and risked undermining the heady politics of the book. After reading Satrapi's interview with Asia Source, however, I understand its purpose: these thick swaths of black and white, with nary a shade of grey, are the same black and white rhetoric that shapes world politics and culture. The characters, sometimes barely more than a stick figure, are the caricatures politicians make of their foes. It's only in the subtle changes of facial expressions -- a widening of the eyes, a furrow of the brow -- that we can see some semblance of a human underneath, small but just as telling as the thought bubbles floating above their heads.
   
   The goal to separate and explain "the people and the terrorist/fanatacist/fundamentalist" stereotype is completely, totally achieved within the first two frames of the novel, where we are ambushed by a row of somber-looking little girls draped in black veils, the symbol of oppression and woman-fearing almost universally despised in the West. With one quick glance we could almost assume these are one portrait of one girl repeated over and over, except for the little whisps of bangs peering from beneath each of the shrouds -- some side-swept, some parted down the center, some curly, some straight. Within seconds we are reminded: these are real people, not soundbytes or 3-second video clips looped over and over for the horrified bemusement of Americans.
   
   Still, while Marji is shamelessly out to shatter the assumption that the Iran people or culture is fundamentalist or oppressive, she refuses to paint the people as shining examples of progressive open-minded goodness who have been unfairly categorized for the one or two freedom-hating fundamentalists. There is evidence of even the kindest, gentlest folk adhering to the more oppressive rules of the regime, but not out of a desire to oppress, but out of faith, tradition, and trust for those in power. Again, this is best exemplified only a few pages in, as we see an image of women demonstrating both for and against the veil. On one side the unveiled women stand erect and angular, eyes narrow yet full of furor, championing the freedom to literally let their hair down. Opposite, a row of veiled women "confront" them, their clenched fists slightly limp, their eyes closed and pious, little Madonnas suffering quietly our sins. The former look young and angry, the latter look almost ancient. They were likely a mixture of the two; there were just too many to tell.
   
   In the current political context, these images are the most striking: little clumps of dogged beliefs squaring off against one another, rows of protesters hurling rocks at soldiers, soldiers aiming guns at protesters, massacred demonstrators lying in the streets, ghostly figures pushing the Shah out of frame and out of power, hordes celebrating the exile of the Shah. Seeing this story unfold through of eyes of a young girl is a very singular, educating, and transforming experience, but even riveting notions like war-from-a-child's-vantage need a kick in the goods, and sometimes the blur of faces could snap me back to the reality the first-person singular was beginning to lose. Images of individuals of many ages, classes, and backgrounds uniting, and eventually overthrowing, a centuries-old monarchy gives a sense of urgency, audacity, and realness to this revolution, which was all but excluded from every single history book I ever read throughout almost two decades of schooling. It made it seem as huge as it was, and is, in a way that neither textbooks nor one little girl can quite describe.

5 comments about Wild Swans : Three Daughters of China.

1. Before leaving for my 2004-05 sojourn in China, I naturally sought to acquaint myself with the culture in which I was about to live and work. Of the various books I read (which ranged from Chinese history to essays from American expats to descriptions of "the Asian mind" as applied to Western business people), it turned out that this book was BY FAR the most helpful in my day-to-day interactions -- both social and business -- with my Chinese associates.
   
   Spanning the early 20th Century when author Chang's grandmother was given as a concubine to a warlord general, through mid-century when Chang's parents joyously risked their lives in the Communist takeover, to 1978 when Chang herself left China, WILD SWANS paints a vivid picture of the China of today. I found that the information in this book, told in first-person story form, gave me far more understanding of my Mainland Chinese colleagues than any journalistic writings ever did, or could have.
   
   Since China is already a major force in western economies (especially America's), and will only become more central to the global economy, I consider it useful to share the observation of my personal experience: Understanding the RECENT LIFE EXPERIENCES of a nation's citizens is even important than understanding its customs. The good news is that history--told well--is a fascinating read! And Jung Chang's story is hard to top.
   
   Doni Tamblyn is author of Laugh and Learn: 95 Ways to Use Humor for More Effective Teaching and Training and The Big Book of Humorous Training Games (Big Book of Business Games Series)



2. Nice review of History of China since world War II. Intersting way of telling story.



3. The story of this family is not usual. The grandmother was the mistress of a warlord, the mother was a communist revolutionist, and her daughter, the author of the book has escaped form China as a young girl. The thing I respect the most, that the author has only used personal experiences, and only written about things she has seen with her own eyes, or things which has happened with her family, and never used unchecked stories in her descriptions. She never tells a word in her story against the regime, even when she writes about the most shocking events in her family, but leave the reader to create his or her own opinion.



4. Some books are to be savored slowly and take me months to finish. Other books, like this one, are a delicious overindulgence of reading, the narrative sweep so compelling that I gobbled up all 505 in almost one fell swoop. Subtitled "Three Daughters of China", this 1991 autobiography is the story of 20th Century China itself. Here we meet three women, the grandmother and mother of the narrator, and the narrator Jung Chang herself, each experiencing the reality of China unique to her particular generation.
   
   Born in 1909, the grandmother lived with the physical pain of her childhood footbinding, was forced to become a concubine to a warlord, and suffered all the indignities shared by women of her generation. The mother was born in 1931, lived through the Japanese occupation of her Manchurian town and the war between Nationalist and Communist China. She became a true believer in Communism, and she and her husband often put the needs of the Communist party above their own. She bore five children, one of whom is the author of this book, who grew up watching her parents become victims of the Cultural Revolution and undergoing torture and imprisonment as the politics of the nation changed. Through hard work and luck and more changes in China, Jung Chang was one of the lucky ones and was able to go to a University in England in 1978.
   
   This book is more than the sum total of its parts however. It is the story of three women against the backdrop of history. I identified with each of them and was saddened and horrified at the details of their lives. In a funny way, while I was reading the book, I felt I was, myself, right there with them, going though the glories and misfortunes of China as it erupted in its dramatic changes. There was joy, there was pain, and there was avid patriotism. Especially though, there was a sense of family and honor that is very uniquely the Chinese. Sometimes I smiled but mostly I was saddened. And the fact that these stories were true made a tremendous impression upon me.
   
   I've read other books about China. If they were fiction, I could get a sense of China, but I only have a limited emotional attachment for fictional characters. I've also read books about travel, mostly written by westerners, and these books were interesting inasmuch as I could see myself as the traveler, the observer. I've also read non-fiction about footbinding which made me grit my teeth a bit but the practices didn't relate to any specific person. All of these books were good, I reviewed them and gave them good ratings, but, frankly, Wild Swans was different. Here were real people against a backdrop of history. The writing was excellent and filled with facts which gave a context to their lives. I was sorry the book ended and I wanted to read more. I wanted to know what happened to Jung Chang after 1978. Of course I went to the internet where I discovered that she has stayed in England, is married to a Brit, and has recently wrote a book with him entitled "Mao.". This is a perfect topic for her. She and her family lived through Mao's greatest glory and his greatest excesses. I even found a webcast in which she talks about the book. She's middle aged now and she has a British accent and I am ordering "Mao" from Amazon today.
   
   Read Wild Swans! You will come away with an understanding of China in a way not possible through the news stories. It's also impossible to put down. I give it one of my very highest recommendations



5. Irony, hypocrisy, suffering, famine, a multitude of tragedy, and a touch of insanity. No, it's not Desperate Housewives re-runs--it's Jung Chang's Wild Swans. The only thing missing is sex, and the reason why is of course a story in itself. If you're looking to kick-off your China reading experience with an essential novel, Wild Swans is for you. First published in Britain in 1991, the novel provides an eye-opening look at China's cultural history between 1900 and 1990 so truthful and thorough that censors have not yet approved it for publication in its original form in mainland China. That alone should make you want to pick up a copy.
   
   In seeking to ameliorate the past and to make sense of her life, Chang delves into her family history, providing a brutally honest portrait of three generations of women. What is truly amazing about Chang's family chronicles are the wealth of hardships Chinese women have had to endure.
   
   The book begins in the early 1900s, with her grandmother's (Yu Fang's) marriage at age 15 to a warlord general. She battled bound feet, loneliness, and the challenges of managing her reputation against conniving servants while isolated in a gilded prison awaiting a husband who might show up for only a few days or a week, once in six years. Once she was required to reside with the general's wife and other concubines, her and her daughter's--Bao Qin's--fates were in the hands of the first wife. Yu Fang had to struggle through the pecking order of the household's women. The details of the customs and rituals of well-to-do lives are quite interesting. Her second marriage was as the second wife of a well-regarded Manchu doctor. He re-names Bao Qin as De Hong, meaning wild swan of virtue.
   
   De Hong, Chang's mother, grew up during the Japanese occupation of Manchuria, during the 1930s and 1940s. She refused to marry a man she did not love and could not respect, so she left home to study at a teacher's college, where she developed communist sympathies. In stark contrast to the pomp and circumstance of her mother's arranged marriage, De Hong had to apply to the party for approval to marry a fellow communist in a binding that didn't even include a real ceremony and had minimal refreshments. They had no honeymoon, but returned to work. De Hong endured terrible emotional and sometimes cruel physical hardship as a result of her husband's party ideals and ambitions. Though she eventually had four children, she was tragically required to give all her time and attention to the party, which persecuted her despite her loyalty. Becoming a communist, she noted, was an "agonizing process." De Hong had little choice but to suffer in silence, as leaving the party would cause her family terrible problems and complaining would bring its own share of woe. Eventually her husband was unfairly and illogically destroyed and betrayed by the system he worked so hard to help create.
   
   Jung, born in 1952, grew up with the privileges of party officers' children. But these privileges brought with them contradictions, confusion, and emotional challenges. Jung attempts to survive, fulfill her dreams, and make sense of the destruction of the topsy-turvy world of the Cultural Revolution and still emerge with something to live for.
   When the schools are closed in 1966, Jung is sent into the countryside to learn how to be a peasant. While there, she is assigned work as a doctor and later an electrician--without any training, she was expected to learn by doing. Her first love is destroyed by revolutionary ideals. Despite her lack of formal education, Jung is accepted into university in 1973 to study the English language. Oddly, after university, students were not given degrees and were supposed to return to whatever jobs they had previously held! Her mother's guanxi helps Jung to secure a job for which she was far better suited--a teacher. As time goes on, she grows more disillusioned with the government and its leader and begins to question all that she has been taught to think all her life. After Mao's death, she enters an academic competition for which the prize is funding to study in the West. In 1978, she goes to London to get a Ph.D., where she remains teaching and writing to this day. A "wild" life, indeed.
   
   Having completed making peace with family history by writing Wild Swans, Chang's next project was of course her myth-busting biography of Mao, published in 2005.

5 comments about Are You Somebody?: The Accidental Memoir of a Dublin Woman.

1. I am astonished at the 5 star reviews for this book. Pay attention to what other readers are saying. I read this book because it was our book club selection of the month. Out of many years in book club, this was the worst book we have read. I am writing this review so others may be spared by the glowing marks of 'professional' reviewers.
   
   It's difficult to describe how rampant the name-dropping was in this book. There were parts of the book in which 10 or more names would appear per page for dozens of pages. I don't care if the names are notable authors, it's boring to read lists of names! This was not writing, this was 'list making'.
   
   The book couldn't hold a theme for more than a couple sentences. (spoilers next)... The author has a miscarriage, which gets just 2 or 3 sentences of attention. The author is raped. Apparently something as life shattering as that gets only a brief mention as well. There are many traumatic and life-changing events that are barely explored in the book, because the look is too busy name-dropping every person she has met.
   
   This memoir should have been exciting, it should have been a great book. What an amazing life she has led, against tragedy and great odds. Yet somehow she manages to make this story sound boring.
   
   An interesting development is the 'Afterward' after the book has ended. It's so well written you can't help but wonder if it was done by the same author? The first 20 pages and the Afterward of this book are great, the 200 pages in the middle are a mess. Do yourself a favor and pay attention to the reviews here. Life is short and there so many great books to read, I regret I'll never get the time back I spent reading this disappointing book.



2. This is a splendidly written autobiography, unbelievably rich in detail and raw emotion. While other reviewers have ably described her life's journey - from a chaotic household with alcoholic parents to a very good job as TV producer and then columnist - this is also a beautiful and vivid evocation of a changing Ireland. O'Faolain provides the grittiest of portraits, of a stalled society that is emerging from centuries of repression and excessive religiosity to a modern society. She herself embodies much of it, journeying (across class lines) from desperate loneliness (seeking love as a panacea) to a self-empowered feminist writer who has the strength to keep going. It is deep and gets you to reflect on your own predicament, particularly middle age.
   
   Warmly recommended.



3. Nuala O'Faolain writes reasonably well. She has developed her craft enough to be labeled lucid, although inspired isn't a word I would use. When she writes about the shift in the concept of family that has taken place over her lifetime she can hold my interest. But what she did with whom over the course of her life, without a deeper examination of why, falls more in the category of vaccuous gossip, and won't hold any serious reader's interest.
   
   Most disappointing of all is the absence of the story that Nuala can't relate, the one she has yet to understand herself. Ms. O'Faolain tells us all about her upbringing as a child of alcoholics, complete with a horrific description of seeing her mother dead drunk on the floor of her home. She even laments the alcoholic demise and early death of her younger brother. But she never admits to alcoholism herself despite a book-long description of irrefutable symptoms. Aside from a borderline flippant remark about what she refers to as a brush with alcoholism and a one-line mention of "addiction" to pills in her younger years, Nuala never conveys any grasp of the nature of the disease that killed her mother and brother, and shortened the life of her father.
   
   For those of us with more than a casual relationship with alcoholism, Ms. O'Faolain's present condition of relative isolation is revealing, as well. It's another predictable phase in the inevitable progression of the disease. She also talks (writes) like a "dry drunk," and has the dysfunctional relationships to prove it. When she writes about retiring alone to read - with a bottle of wine - it is painfully obvious that she is living in denial of her own condition, that she has missed perhaps the most important revelation available to her. As she left us at the end of her book, it appears that the lessons her ancestors paid such a terrible price to impart have escaped Ms. O'Faolain.
   
   Alcoholics and their families and friends are among the many who would want to read "Are You Somebody?," and they want to read it with the hope that an understanding of alcoholism was reached by the author, especially after such a traumatic lifetime experience with the disease. Nuala has yet to absorb that lesson. When she does, the story she can relate will acquire a depth that escapes her present version.



4. I love the flow of Nuala's writing style. So beautifully written, almost poetic. I find myself reading some passages over many times to contemplate what is being said. She's so insightful to human character.



5. Nuala O'Faolain has been a waitress, sales clerk and maid; a university lecturer; a television producer, and, most recently, a columnist at The Irish Times. She is Dublin-born and bred, but received an education at Oxford, England, and did tv work in the United Kingdom. She has now returned to Dublin, and, in middle age, written this well-received memoir.
   
   Through most of its history, Ireland has been a tough country for women merely to live, let alone to establish satisfactory lives and careers, and O'Faolain's struggle to do both is at the heart of her memoir. Born one of nine children to an overwhelmed alcoholic mother; and a charming father who chose to spend his time, his money, and his charm elsewhere, leaving his family day-to-day poor, O'Faolain claims to have had the classic hard-scrabble Irish childhood. And from her writings, it seems she did. Though it should be noted that, whatever her father's faults, he was one of Ireland's best-known journalists, under a "nom de plume," as it happened. And it simply does not seem to me that, however hard Ireland was on women -- and we know it was-- it's quite so miraculous that a child of a well-known journo, whether male or female, should rise to become a well-known journo in his or her own turn. It's just not quite as extraordinary as, say, a child of an illiterate day laborer taking that same career path.
   
   Be that as it may, the North Dublin family was poor, and Mam wasn't up to much. Nuala reads books, struggles to get herself an education, discovers boys, pushes at the restrictive boundaries of Catholic Ireland at that time, and finally leaves the country to complete her education and begin her career. She seems to have been expert at finding help in stony ground, always a helpful ability. She seems also to take pride in having been an icebreaker for others as she pushed at those booundaries, as well she might, and she gives us quite an interesting view of talented young people struggling to find the way out of stultifying mid-20th century Dublin. She also seems to have found help in working herself up the career ladder, on her back, as they say. Some pretty heavy names are dropped, some others are held back. But there's no denying a girl can, at a minimum, learn a lot from pillow talk, if she picks the right pillow talkers. And she's certainly not the first or last woman to have gotten that kind of help up the ladder; let anybody who cares to throw the first stone.
   
   Now in lonely middle age, without male companionship or children, O'Faolain's unusually honest about her circumstances. Of course, it seems evident that, as a younger woman, O'Faolain was choosing her male companions for qualities other than the likelihood that they would stick with her for the long haul. Nevertheless, plenty of men and women have looked hard for mates for the long haul, without necessarily finding them. Ways to live must still be found. A lot of people wind up middle-aged and lonely, and can be grateful for the author's honesty.
   
   O'Faolain's trip has taken her some interesting places, and she has always been a keen-eyed observer with a keen pen. At one point, she writes of life in Oxford,"In real life, glamour consisted of my friend and myself getting done up in high heels and tight black skirts. Tucked into the skirts, and anchored by wide elastic belts, we wore men's white nylon shirts with the sleeves rolled up. We had big pointy breasts (old nylons stuffed in our bras), a thick layer of yellowy Pan-Stik on our faces, black lines going up from the corners of our eyes, Vaseline on our shocking-pink lips. In the Crystal Ballroom we two beauties eyed guys with duck's arse haircuts and crepe-soled shoes, while we condescended to dance with awe-struck Malaysian students." It's the next best thing to being there for us readers.
   
   Later she remarks, " I am still acquainted with a lot of the people I knew in Dublin around 1970. But most of them are so different now that the past might never have been. I remember the vulnerable, not always dignified young people who are, now, dignitaries: a judge, a professor, a feared critic, a consultant. In a more confident culture, people like these would reclaim their youth. In North America, people, however powerful they become, are happy to go to reunions to recapture the innocence of youth."
   
   O'Faolain found her way through her years, through alcoholism and severe depression, to become, at least, a person who owns her own life. And, hey, that's not so bad: generations of women all around the world have never achieved it, and still don't.

5 comments about Split: A Memoir of Divorce.

1. I could not put this book down. Finnamore brings the utter angst, grief and full gamut of emotions one experiences when getting divorced in this wonderful memoir. I look forward to reading her novels and wish her the best.



2. incredibly spot on in terms of the emotional rollercoaster of an unwanted divorce, I cracked up on the "obligatory trip across the ocean" and many other escapades. I managed to skip the sex with the ex but otherwise it was a perfect mirror. Read it and laugh!



3. Shame on you Suzanne Finnamore, in your first to memoirs you didn't share with your faithful readers the huge red flags that were waving in your face about your husband "N". Thus, some of us justifiably felt a little cheated ourselves when we found out about these omens after the fact in your latest memoir of divorce, "Split". That aside, you did a superb job describing the horrors and heartbreak of betrayal. You made us laugh and cry and feel joyful at your survival.
   
   But now...enough about you, okay? You are such a terrific writer, I can imagine that your fiction would be sensational! Funny, pithy, insightful, deep...how about a whole story based on characters modeled after Betty Lady and Christopher? Make something up...enough real life already.



4. One Friday evening, Suzanne Finnamore's life splits wide open. She stands in her kitchen in black cigarette pants, checking her lipstick and anticipating the weekend when her husband strolls in the door, gives her a kiss, grabs a martini, and, very soon, delivers the life-rending blow.
   
   He states it simply and explicitly, "I. Want. A. Divorce." After telling his devastated spouse that he deserves happiness, he packs, puts on his best blazer and is out the door.
   
   What about her? Both the reader and the soon-to-be-former wife wonder.
   
   Split is painful and enlightening to read as Finnamore recounts her despair and eventual recovery. (She assures us in the preface that both she and her son are well and happy, so I'm not giving anything away.) What is delightful and riveting about the book is that Finnamore is a fine writer with a quick and insightful sense of humor. What could be bleak and discouraging turns out to be quite the opposite.
   
   The heroine (and she is one) may lose N, as she designates him, but she gains insight from her more-than-delightful mother, Bunny. The morning after the leave-taking, Bunny shows up with a fifth of Jack Daniels and a half-gallon of butter pecan ice cream. Now there's a mom! Bunny isn't the only one to stick by Finnamore. Her friend Lisa is always there for her and never, ever, there for N. Lisa is wise. She knows just when to reveal some difficult truths and when to offer moral support.
   
   Some people say that divorce is harder than widowhood because the jerk keeps showing up. Both are the loss of a relationship; mourning must be done. Finnamore casts her successful journey to recovery in terms of the classic model of loss, moving forward across the stages from denial through anger, bargaining, and grief until finally arriving at acceptance. And she does it with good nature and understanding.
   
   Consider, for example, a few of her entries: "Ten Simple Yet Elegant Tips for Divorce;" "Change the locks;" and "When confronted with a practical question regarding fairness to your ex, err on the side of lifetime vendetta." Clearly, these are from the "Acceptance" stage.
   
   While anyone who has been part of an ending relationship, whether through divorce or otherwise, will appreciate Split. The audience is not that limited. All readers who enjoy a skillfully written memoir will relish this book and be looking for more Finnamore to delight in.
   
   by Patricia Nordyke Pando
   for Story Circle Book Reviews
   reviewing books by, for, and about women



5. I am in the midst of an unwanted divorce. Suzanne absolutely nails the feelings of those of us left behind in the dust of our husband's quest for eternal youth and "happiness" - their happiness, not ours and our children's. If you want a glimpse inside the emotional trainwreck that is divorce, but with humor and style, read this book. It may help you wade through your own divorce or help you understand women in your life who have been betrayed by their spouse. It is a quick read - I read it in two hours without stopping.