5 comments about Rescuing Jeffrey: A Memoir.

1. this memoir was. What a an act of courage (the word bravery comes to mind also) that Jeffrey's father had at the time of his sons accident. It is just a short fast read but it packed full of insight. The hardback has a haunting picture on its cover..



2. When I first starting reading this book my frame of reference was Christopher Reeve's book "Still Me", about the struggles of facing quadriplegia after a tragic accident. I found Mr. Reeve's book inspiring in many ways and disheartening in other ways. Mr. Reeve was wealthy enough, and had multiple insurance and disability policies to fund a private clinic in his own home, with a full time staff of nurses, aides and therapists. In Mr. Galli's book, I was disheartened more than anything else. For a large part of the book he weighs the pros and cons of ending his son's life, not considering what his son would want to do. We're not talking about a brain dead person here, just how his son's new life of incapacity and dependence will impact his parents. Mr. Galli, in the irony of ironies, is an attorney, and is facing the prospect of hundreds of thousands, if not millions of dollars in costs caring for his son over his lifetime, and has nobody to sue. That seems to be a strong undercurrent in this book. Not just "Whose Life Is It Anyway?", but who pays for the continuance of this life in anyplace other than a lousy nursing home? This is really an issue for our society to deal with. I'm not sure if I want my taxes and health insurance costs to go up enough to cover paying $500,000. a year for every handicapped person who wants to remain at home to get all of the services that are required. And I was also very turned off by Mr. Galli's appeal for funds to pay for his son's care. Christopher Reeve solicited money for his foundation to do research and give out "quality of life" grants to paralyzed individuals, not for his personal use. Mr. Galli wants people to send in money to his son's trust fund to lighten the burden on himself.
   When I was a kid, and I am in my mid 50's, the phrase "accidents happen" was an accepted part of life. Today it seems that the accepted standard is that "negligence happens", and that there is almost always someone to sue.
   Jeffrey Galli had an extremely unfortunate accident. But I do believe that accidents happen, and I will continue to take care of my family members, and the Gallis, and their family and friends, should take care of theirs. And when you can no longer care for your son the same dreadful nursing homes will be available to you that the rest of us are stuck with for our loved ones.



3. This is a finely written memoir of a dreadful event -- a swimming accident that left the author's teenaged son paralyzed. The story takes us over the first days after the accident -- a time when the parents are trying to balance their son's options -- and the possibility of terminating life support. This is a very moving book, and I could not help but be profoundly impressed by the son, Jeffrey, along with his family and the network of supportive friends. I recommend this book without reservation. On another, perhaps less important note, I should mention that the author is also a very good writer. It is frequent in memoir books that I overlook style because of the content. But in this case, the content was very moving, as I said; the writing was very, very good. One last comment -- I cannot help but wonder if the negative reviewers finished the book. They might be surprised.



4. When my son was also injured in a diving accident in 1991 just pior to his 29th birthday, one of the counselors talked with me about the variances in each level of injury... and the variances within each level. This book relates totally ... and likewise, not at all. Such injuries do encompass such huge differences and yet still create huge bonds amongst SCI families and their friends. In 1991, I didn't have the availability of all the resources that can now be found so easily on the web... this improvement in availability is an additional tool in helping us learn and in helping us share/teach; alongside the medical improvements that increase the quality of life for those in wheelchairs. The wheelchair is what people see; the reality is so much more. As a mother, I appreciated reading the reactions from the other side of the parenting role... a father's honesty and truth... I know it was not easily exposed. Different angles of perception; same levels of love. Thank you, Jeffrey, as your father wrote... for sacrificing your privacy so he could tell the story.



5. When a tragedy such as the one Richard Galli experienced in his family occurs, the family is expected to nod in agreement at platitudes from well-meaning aquaintences such as , "At least he's still alive." But sometimes we're not truly glad our loved one is alive. Sometimes our love is so deep and the prognosis is so bad that we want to say, "NO!" But it is rare to have the courage to admit it if our society would be more cmfortable otherwise.

   Richard Galli obviously shared his feelings with rare honesty. He didn't tell a sappy story that would make us feel better. He told the truth. It is apparent that he didn't write for the popular commercial success, but for more personal and intimate reasons. Those who dare to read it with an open heart can benefit from his bravery in sharing his thoughts and feelings with no regard for what anyone not in his situation might think.

5 comments about Whiskey's Children.

1. Think of all the good things you wish for your children -- health, happiness, safety and love must surely be on the list -- and then realize, if you are an alcoholic, what you may in truth pass on: fear, grief, rage, an inability to love or be loved, and the terminal disease of alcoholism itself. Mr. Erdmann explores his heritage of alcoholism, passed down from his grandfather to his father to him, and the legacy he gave his children. Burdens too big and confusing for their small trembling shoulders, fear, confusion -- so so sad, and so so common. If you are or think you are an alcoholic, do yourself and the people you love a favor and read this. And even if you don't want to quit drinking, find an AA meeting, shut your mouth and open your ears; give your children a chance, even if you never got one.



2. Alcoholism is not an emotional disorder per se, but it does sometimes have emotional triggers. When my dad started drinking in beer joints, he was in his thirties and had buried two wives and five children. I suffered inconsqentially as a result of his stopping at the nearest joint from our house on the way back for Saturday movies on the town, and I would have to hide in the backseat of the car. Since we had to traverse many curves for the few miles to get home, I remember praying all the way there for God to let us live.
   
   You can tell the children whose dad drinks alcohol, because he carries a load of guilt and pain, thinking he caused the abuse he would later reap by, looking at families who walk by and look at the young ones' faces. It is devastating.
   
   This town has a long history going back to bootlegger days before prohibition of brewing their own 'spirits' openly and for a long time on the main street of town (which they do again in this modern, accepting age), and the men are proud to be drinkers. They look down on those who are not addicted to alcohol. They are the dummies. One local writer told me recently, "You think I am just a drunk." I replied, "If I did that, why would I ask you to show me how to drink?" which he refused to do as I have liver disease. He was his usual 'confused' self and asked "Why did you choose me?" My honest answer, "I trust you because I know you won't touch me" and I thought he might feel enough responsibility to not let any of the other drunks take advantage if I started acting silly. But he told me that he can't control his own drinking, so he ended up not even offering me a drink of water. Ever! Now, I know water is not going to cause this hemangioma to burst, but it seems that something else did. Probably the pain pills I have taken for a chronic nerve pain I have had since 1994. Feeling sorry for me yet, Arthur Hardaway.
   
   Jack Daniels' Whiskey from right here in Tennessee is internationally known and sought after; people come from all over the United States looking for Lynchburg, Tennessee, as if they were seeking the Holy Grail. I heard a bigoted preacher get all emotional about the difference in immersion vs. sprinkling. He said that sprinkling is like scattering a little dirt on top of a dead person instead of burying him in a grave. Since I am a Methodist, I told him that he 'hit below the belt.' He also proclaimed that only immersed Baptists will enter Heaven. For years, I thought it was Seventh Day Adventists who preached that. My sister Evelyn belonged to that group for awhile until they betrayed her.
   
   Jack Erdmann has written othre books because I have reviewed one or more. He was the son of a jazz musician and an ex-chorus dancer in St. Louis. His reminiscing starts in 1934 when, as an altar boy, he drank the communion wine. Then, like this local writer, he drank because of loneliness. He even thinks his son should be allowed to buy beer when he is old enough to 'serve his country' in war but not yet old enough to vote. How dumb can you be!
   
   Co-writer Larry Kearney, a poet who settled in San Francisco (where Jack lives), was born in Brooklyn in 1943. Both are recovering alcoholics.



3. Jack Erdmann's story of his long struggle back from the strangling grip that alcoholism held on his life, as well as over members of his family for four generations, is a tour de force. This book is not just for alcoholics, or for drinkers who feel that they "don't have a problem," it is for everyone who is willing to accompany Erdmann on a harrowing journey.

   For those readers with alcoholics in the family, they--we--find ourselves nodding with recognition, and ultimately uplifted by the knowledge that there's a way up from the bottom. They will find assistance from now-sober alcoholics "with kind eyes, offering hot cups of bad coffee," in the words of Anne Lamott, a recovering alcoholic herself, who wrote the foreword.

   You want an "easy, feel-good" book--well, there are plenty of THOSE. You want one that will change your life, or that of someone whom you love, or that will give breathtaking insights into the lives of the alcoholics you know, "Whiskey's Children" is the best effort I've found. There are pathos, self-degradation, guilt, self-loathing, and even a quiet humor in these pages.

   If Amazon offered more than five stars, Erdmann and his co-author Larry Kearney would have earned them many times over. Not just for writing, but from their phoenix-life resurrection from the ashes of an alcoholic life.

   This is a wonderful book.




4. An unusal accounting of a whole bunch of ingested liquor. Happily with a happy ending. Sadly, though, a between-the-lines documentary of a beat poet who coulda been a contendah. Then again, he's still here now, and b.p. can be thought of as re-manifest in such pubs as McSweeney's where Mr. Erdmann (via Mr. Kearney) might consider submitting manuscript.



5. Whiskey's Children is a great book, period. While it chronicled the casual horrors and quiet heartbreak of a family damaged by alcohol better than any book I've read, it also tells a universal story of human frailty and persistance. It is shocking, depressing...and funny. Read it for any reason, and then read 'A Bar on Every Corner' by the same author.

No comments about Asperger Syndrome - A Love Story.

1 comments about Adventures in Darkness: Memoirs of an Eleven-Year-Old Blind Boy.

1. Tom Sullivan has "seen" more in a lifetime of accomplishments than anybody I know (come on: how many folks do you know who've played Augusta, run the Marine Corps marathon, appeared on Carson, sold out Vegas, built a blessed family life ... you get the point). It's a breathtaking record that blows away the boundaries most of us assume apply to the lives of the blind or people with similar physical challenges. Adventures in Darkness is the story of seemingly smaller successes - it tells of his pivotal 11th summer, when Sullivan's fierce desire to experience life as a "normie" led him into a series of adventures that make for hilarious, uplifting and deeply affecting reading.
   
   Every child has felt alone, misunderstood and deeply conscious of not belonging. For most of us, it's a transitory part of growing up that hopefully leaves us with humility and empathy as character traits, and shallow enough scars that we're in no way disfigured. We know that the blind experience entirely another level of separation. We know, but with the mixture of embarrassment about our own good fortune and an unwillingness to delve into anything that might sadden us, too often we may hesitate to pick a story about someone who lives with a disability. So here's the good news about Adventures in Darkness: it's a tremendously fun read.
   
   Sullivan's tale will feel familiar to every reader, but it's his storyteller's artistry that has you racing through the book, connected to the common smells, milestones and challenges of growing up, and to the special sense of how indomitable this particular human spirit was and is. What separates Adventures in Darkness from the "up from the bootstraps" mainstream is that it is a good story, well told and from an unexpected perspective. Sullivan is blind; he will make you see. You'll see his deeply loving and disastrously damaged parents; and most of all, you'll see a real kid. Tom Sullivan, as a boy and as a man, has a crushing disability ... and he deals with it. With humor, without pretense, and acutely conscious of human limitations well beyond his blindness, Tom Sullivan makes us share his conviction that while he may have unusual talents and a frightening handicap, he is deeply connected to each of us.
   
   At 11, in the summer that propels him into Adventures in Darkness, Tom Sullivan learns that each of us is independent, dependent, and interdependent. We are defined by what we bring to the world and how we deal with others, and the sighted no less than the blind find ourselves depending on others. It's a lesson of a lifetime, and you'll seldom find it more convincingly or enjoyably brought home.

5 comments about GIMP: The Story Behind the Star of Murderball.

1. The product was great and Woody's book store communicated great through email about the purchase and ordering information. The only thing is the number of days that it took to ship was confusing; I thought it would get to me sooner, but what the number of days meant was when it would be shipped as opposed to it arriving to me.



2. Sometimes, people who have been "handicapped" in some manner end up withdrawing into themselves. A few of them are downright miserable. Mad at the world for being stuck in the situation they're in... the best they can hope for (because they're depressing to be around) is to have people feel sorry for them.
   
   Mark Zupan (who, hopefully, you know from the astoundingly-good, and deserved-to-win-the-Oscar documentary, MURDERBALL), is NOT one of those people. He doesn't WANT anyone to feel sorry for him. (In fact, he doesn't even want to be seen as a "role model," or an "inspiration," though [sorry Mark!], to a lot of people, he is.)
   
   Mark was an athletic, fun-loving 18-year-old, having a blast in South Florida when everything he knew changed in an instant. Sleeping off a night of heavy partying in the back of his buddy Chris Igoe's parked pickup, he had no clue when his friend got in and (also drunk) drove off. Not too long thereafter, Igoe swerved off the road and Mark ended up flying out of the truck-bed, over a fence, and into some dense foliage overhanging a small lake. (Igoe had no idea Mark was in the truck bed, so when the police came, they never looked for him.)
   
   Mark regained consciousness, only to find himself unable to move (he didn't know it yet, but he was paralyzed from the neck down), hanging upside-down from a branch with his nose just inches from the water... and getting closer by the moment. He hung there for 14 hours, before a workman heard him yelling for help.
   
   And that's just the START of the story!
   
   In the years that followed, he has not only become one of the star players of the sport known as Quad Rugby (a.k.a. Murderball), his attitude about his "situation" (whether he likes it or not!) has helped untold numbers of others* to better cope with their own situations.
   
   
   * I know of what I speak. My young and lovely wife has been in a wheelchair for several years due to Multiple Sclerosis. After seeing the movie MURDERBALL --and *especially* after meeting Zupan at a tournament, her attitude went from "good" to fantastic. She's no longer "the girl in the wheelchair." She's simply my wife, who's fun to be around, and who's interested in doing the things she CAN do, rather than fretting about the things she can't.
   
   -Jonathan Sabin



3. A fast paced, gritty look into an Athlete's brush with death and the long road to recovery. If you are looking for the next inspiration for a cheesy After School Special on overcoming adversity...don't read this book. If you are looking for a well written, insightful look into how one guy copes with tragedy and disability, then this is an excellent read. To say Gimp has texture is an understatement thanks to its subject, Mark Zupan, a quadriplegic athlete who was made famous by the documentary Murder Ball. Gimp details how this proud, perhaps arrogant athlete dealt with a tragic accident that cost him the full use of his limbs thanks to drunken night that resulted in a brush with death and a debilitating spinal cord injury.
   
   Gimp does not spare us the details that are often left out of such stories including the uglier side of human emotion. The books subject faces Zupan's denial, doubt, guilt, fear, despair and loss as a result of his tragedy. While he ultimately comes to terms with his injury and recovery, it is not without some serious setbacks, some self inflicted. It is this part of writer Timothy Swanson's writing that really sets Gimp apart. He does not spare Zupan some hard looks into his darker nature to include arrogance, self indulgence and outright self destructiveness at times. If there is a villain in the book, it is Zupan himself and his own feelings of despair and anger. It is Swanson's description of Zupan's struggle with his own dark feelings and fears that give the story its power.
   
   The book is not without its own sense of humor and offers a dark amusement that Zupan has for the hand life has dealt him. Gimp deftly shows Zupan's outlook on life which is headstrong and confident but not without his fair share of hidden frailty in the face of a near death experience. In fact, the description of the actual accident that describes Zupan clinging to life, literally perhaps, is the book's strongest section. I have many friends who suffer from war wounds, especially brain injuries from IED's or "danger close" air strikes and I can say from personal experience that Gimp does an excellent job at looking at how proud warriors (in Gimp's case a world class athlete), deal with injury and recovery. I recommend this book without reservation to certainly anyone who knows someone who suffers from a disability or who has seen the documentary Murder Ball. The book has broader appeal to fans of sports writing as well since the book leaves no doubt that Zupan is an athlete. The fact that it is an easy read and has a brisk pace is no small feat given that other works of this genre tend to drag on, lack direction and are often burdened with sappy and clichéd, touchy-feely housewife book club nonsense. Zupan's force of will as described by Swanson carries the book along as does the suspense of how he will cope with each stage of his recovery and his entrance into the world of quad rugby aka Murder Ball. I thought it was a great read and recommend it without reservation.



4. This is a great book. Inspiring, entertaining, hilarious, and real. Mark doesn't pull any punches in this. It is not a self-pity book nor does it try to lecture the reader. It is a real account of someone who is very inspiring, yet doesn't pretend to be what he isn't.
   
   Once I started reading this I couldn't put it down. Awesome!!!



5. Mark Zupan makes you think about what you have, not what you do not have.
   
   He may be in a chair, but he is not handicap. Mark Zupan speak frankly and openly about his life before and after. He does not blame anyone for his injury.
   
   Make you think you life is O.K. and despite what happens you can survive and go on.
   
   Life is not so bad.

5 comments about Ultimate Judgment : A Story of Emotional Corruption, Obsession and Betrayal.

1. Ms. Clairmonte is a severely disturbed woman, who, when she found out she had been left out of the will of her step-father, destroyed the memory of a great man, making up horrible lies, and sued her own mother, leaving her mother broke and penniless. Shame on Ms. Clairmonte, how can she live her with herself?



2. I thought the book was great. I just wish they would have wrapped things up a little more at the end.



3. I am Ms. Meg Clairmonte's Ex Sister-in-law. I have heard for years about Meg's court case and book. My son, her nephew, just turned 18 and graduated from high school. I am a single mother and have struggled for years to support us and now we are trying to send him to Tech school in the fall.
   
   The only reason I am telling you all that is to say this...
   
   I just found out that Meg's step-father, Don had created a trust fund for my son. If the reason Meg sued for all that money was for "therapy" as her lawyer once told me, then why, pray tell, was it necessary to take the trust funds that were supposed to benefit my son and hers. (Yes, she took her own son's money, too. I guess she figured that he wouldn't need any money, either)? Did that additional sum of money make a big difference in her settlement? Well, I can tell you that it would have made a big difference in my son's life right now, when we are trying to scrape up the money for school.
   
   I know you can tell that I am very hurt by this. My guess would be that the reason she did it was because I would not be sucked into the law suit and testify on her behalf. My experience with Meg before Don died and she started telling the world about her life with him was that she was manipulative and spiteful. So, there you are, she has proved me right. And this time it was at my son's expense and hers, too.
   
   Just wish everyone who read the book and felt so sorry for Meg could read this, too. As I knew from the beginning, it was always about the money...



4. I've learned from personal experience that Meg is truely as strong and good hearted as she seems. I cringe at the thought of the horrible things she was forced to endure for so long and can only pray this book touches others as much as it has me. Meg's story inspires everyone to never give up or give in to the wicked people surrounding us. I thank the Lord everyday for the voice he has given her, and hope that others can find peace that have been through similar tragidies.



5. I met this wonderful person that this book was written about. She gave me this book when she learned that I too was abused. It is incredible how she has turned so much pain and suffering into something positive as she shows so clearly in the way she leads her life. I never thought in a million years there was so much abuse going on in our United States. It't time that abuse is stopped including verbal, mental,emotional and sexual. I pray that in opening the scarrs and barring her soul in her book that Megan will be continuely blessed and never forgotten. Your Friend, June

5 comments about Ten Things I Learned from Bill Porter.

1. I laughed and I cried. I first heard of this book because it was on the New York Times Bestseller list. Also I watched clips of the movie "Door to Door" when my kids checked the video out from the library. I've become fascinated with Bill who has physical limitations and knew no limit. Despite physical challenges, he is such an inspiration to all of us who take daily tasks for granted, like putting on a tying our shoes, putting on a tie, or simply typing. Bill could only type one finger at a time. His assistant, Shelly Brady weaves her personal connection with Bill throughout. The book is a welcome addition to all middle school and high school libraries.



2. This is in my top three inspirational books. The real-life work ethic and example of Bill Porter (as told by his assistant Shelly Brady) is TRUE inspiration. The old saying "you can't keep a good man down" rings true here. I picked up this little book at Atlanta-Hartsfield Airport a few years back when my flight was delayed. I read it in the terminal and finished it on the plane. THIS BOOK IS WORTH MORE THAN ALL OF THE STEPHEN COVEYS, DALE CARNEGIES and JOEL BARKERS combined (these guys wrote "Snake Oil for the Soul"). Should you need inspiration FIND IT HERE! Bill Porter is the real deal...not a thinker, but a doer. Thank you Shelley for sharing your and Bill's story.



3. A few things I learned from Bill Porter are the power of persistence and that there really are no obstacles. Actually, Porter seems to take persistence to the extreme, and as for obstacles, it is not that they do not exist, but that for Porter, they have never been allowed to become the reasons for his failure. In fact, he refuses to let his cerebral palsy define who he is. Rather he insists on being defined for what he has contributed - the service he has given to others through his career as a salesman.
   
   I had to reconsider that too. What is a salesman? A bothersome person who is intruding on your personal space to convince you to buy something that you didn't really want? Or can a salesman be a person who really does add value to your life by looking after your interests as a consumer and making sure you get the best deal. Well, I think everyone knows both kinds. And because of the former, most people have made the latter's ability to penetrate our defenses all the more challenging.
   
   The last thing I ever wanted to be was a salesperson. But I am learning now how much this attitude has crippled me in my own profession, which happens to be education. The fact is that the ability to approach others and expand your personal network of friends and associates is critical to bringing your unique contributions to others, and even more importantly, partnering with others so that they may offer their contributions in return. When you consider it on a grander scale, where would the world be without those luminaries in history who had to intrude upon the mental space of others and sell revolutionary ideas to the people, especially when they did not want to hear? From God's Prophets to sages and scientists, it always took courage and persistence to come out of one's own secure personal space and carry a message to people who are usually not open at first to receiving it. I do not mean to stretch the purpose of the book too far, but this is what it meant to me, as an educator seeking to improve myself in the realm of networking so that I can bring my services to more people.
   
   Shelly Brady taught me something too: the importance of friendship. While a cynical voice did nag me from time to time while reading this book, I reflected on how people with different strengths can form partnerships that allow both to go much farther than they ever could have gone alone. Without Brady, Porter would be no less courageous and inspiring, but he certainly did not have the vision Brady had to bring his story to so many other people through public speaking, books, and film. And what I think really comes through more so than any notion of self-interest is Brady's true love and concern for Porter, and her desire to share his profound impact on her life with others. Perhaps most importantly, her attitude toward Porter is characterized by awe rather than pity. Contrast that with how most of us would meet a Bill Porter and automatically assume our advantages while secretly allowing some fear or challenging circumstance to hold us back. Brady demonstrates here, that she admires Porter for never feeding his excuses for failure, and that she has drawn on his inspiration to overcome her own.
   
   A telling example is how she contrasts her memories of childhood with his. His memories were not of growing up with cerebral palsy, but rather of sunbaths, his loving mother, and other simple joys. Too many of us have buried our memories of childhood joys under Freudian self-analytical blame of our parents or other happenstance. What we learn from Bill Porter is that it matters far less why these obstacles are there than how they can be surmounted.
   
   I did not read this book in a single afternoon, although it certainly could be read that way. I took in its inspirational lessons in short spurts and experienced a small portion at a time. It is light reading, but worth the investment of enough time to allow "Ten Things I Learned from Bill Porter" to sink in.



4. "Ten Things I Learned from Bill Porter" is ideal for someone who has seen the TV movie "Door to Door" or is otherwise ALREADY familiar with, and inspired by, the story of Bill Porter.
   
   The book, unfortunately, is poorly written. Each chapter comes across as if it were conceived independently of the others. Biographical information about Bill Porter is repeated numerous times, and a fair amount of time is spent talking about the author's own life issues. Halfway through the book I found myself skimming paragraphs and whole pages, looking to get back to the thrust of the story about Bill Porter.
   
   If you are looking for a biography of Bill Porter, this is not it. If you are very hungry for any additional information about Porter, this book may be worth your time.



5. To appreciate Bill Porter's life and success it is far better to see him portrayed in the movie 'Door To Door' featuring William H. Macy. Shelly Brady's book completely misses the mark. I found it to be a little too self-serving, syrupy, and terribly redundant at times. It read like the Bill Porter story starring Shelly Brady.

5 comments about The Day Donny Herbert Woke Up: A True Story.

1. The very idea that someone could wake up from a Rip Van Winkle like coma is amazing enough, but that the family could converse with him was astounding. I was left wanting to know a little more about Donny's eventual death and the effect of the waking on his family, but I suppose that story is still waiting to unfold.
   Donny's story should make us think about the kind of care we render to minimally conscious and comatose patients.
   I preached about this story one Father's Day.



2. While this book doesn't have a typical "happy ending" it ends with closure for the family, and is a very interesting and fairly well written book with a lot of backround information about the families and the struggles this couple experienced. Very good!



3. I could not believe they would let their dog run after their car all the way out to a suburb and I could not read anymore after he apparently got confused and lost the scent.
   
   What kind of end did HE come to ?



4. As a firefighter this book hit close to home. Also, the fact that I am a member of a fire department who unfortunately shared a similar case in which a firefighter was comatose for 13 years made this book extremely interesting. If you, or someone you know is a firefighter, buy this book. It it an easy, quick read yet it makes a person realize just how fragile life is. It also brings back memories of fires I have fought where just such an accident could have happened to me or my fellow firefighters. If you happen to be Catholic, the story is even more interesting. I highly recommend it.



5. I was sadly disappointed that I thought the last part of the book was the best part. I knew what the book was about--by the cover and the fly leaf(s) but the story seemed to go along at a snails pace until I got toward the end of the book.
   
   I would be interested in seeing (or hearing) Donny speaking. I felt my heart ache for the author when I read about how Donny was--I don't want to give away anything in this review.. just to say I felt the most emotion for the author at the end of the book.

5 comments about Deaf Like Me.

1. Very touching story of parents realizing that it is ok to have a deaf daughter and that she is no less of a person than her older brother. Many of the misconceptions are brought out in the story of their wanting nothing but the best for their daughter. Highly recommend this book for anybody that has a hearing impaired child or know of parents who are struggling with this in their family.



2. This book, the true-life story of parents who struggle to do the best they can for their deaf child, is one of the most concise and important books ever written on this subject.
   
   The book doesn't tell hearing parents what decisions they should make for their deaf child, but instead tells this family's story in an easy to read and engaging first-person narrative, written from the point of view of the child's father.
   
   Lynn Spradley's revelation at the dinner table, after her parents teach her the first signs they've learned at a night school class, is heart breaking and revealing. 'Name me?' she demands to know. What is my name? Without sign language, there was no way to bridge the gap between parent and child, and she was five years old before she knew her own name.



3. "Deaf Like Me" is one of my favorite books of all time in any genre, and I heartily recommend it to anyone who comes across this page.
   
   The book is a richly detailed autobiography of one family's struggles to grow up with deafness in mid-1960s America. As such, it provides a terrific introduction into a key moment in the history of deaf education when deaf children were still suffering from a wrong-headed emphasis on lip reading and vocalization, rather than sign language. Members of the deaf community have long heralded the book for this reason.
   
   But "Deaf Like Me" isn't a book just for deaf people and others interested in deaf culture. To the contrary, I think, it's a book for anyone who grew up in 1960s America, and possibly for anyone who has struggled to communicate with loved ones ever.
   
   That's because there are so many parallels between this little family's struggles to learn how to communicate with one another against a background of changing norms and great uncertainty, and the difficulties that many American families went through in the 1960s to speak with and understand one another on issues ranging from civil rights to the Vietnam war. Such struggles afflict most generations everywhere.
   
   None of this is to suggest that I think the authors of "Deaf Like Me" intended to write a metaphorical treatise on 1960s America much less humanity. To the contrary, I believe the authors' sole focus was on the Spalding family's particular struggles. One of the authors was a trained anthropologist, and that comes through in the book's unerring attention to details as opposed to generalizations. It's these details in large part that bring the book to life.
   
   Nonetheless, as a hearing person with no deaf family members, I found myself identifying with this book a lot. I suffered as the little girl Lynn and her parents suffered. And I rejoiced in their discovery that everyone in the family can express themselves and be understood if only they learn to "hear" one another in the different ways that each of us has to communicate.
   
   Strongly recommended.



4. Many people find this book THE book to read in regards to a deaf child's experience (of course, that includes her family as well). And this book is very good at showing you what a hearing family goes through when a deaf child is born into it. It tells of the "typical" struggle between raising their child strictly oral or letting them sign, too.

   Many doctors and therapists tell hearing parents that to allow their deaf child to sign would be to hinder their ability to speak, lipread, or progress intellectually. All of this is hogwash, but, nevertheless, that is what this book is about. What should we do with our child?

   If you're looking for that kind of informative read, this book is sure to please. For me, it was just another book about the same old issue and I found myself skimming often just to get to something original. As harsh as that may sound, that's just this deafie's opinion. :v)




5. Deaf Like Me is a story of 2 young parents struggling to raise their deaf daughter, Lynn, in a hearing world. Written by Thomas Spradley, Lynn's father, the book begins before Lynn was born with her mother's fear of rubella. The book takes you through the fear and waiting for the pregnancy and the eventual realization of Lynn's deafness. The story is written in a simple, straightforward manner, yet conveys the emotions of the new parents. The descriptions Thomas gives are often lacking in vibrancy and inventive vocabulary, but at the same time he conveys honest, true-to-life emotion.
   The first 80% of the book is focused on the Spradley's attempts to raise Lynn to succeed in the hearing world. Thomas agonizingly describes the auditory training and constant schooling that he and his wife give Lynn, only to have her barely speaking 4 words at the age of 5. The constant movement of the family portrays varying experiences that Lynn and her parents go through as they try to teach her lip-reading and speech. It is not until the last 2 chapters that the Spradleys finally realize that communication with their daughter is more important than their dreams for her success as a `normal' hearing person and begin teaching her sign. These last two chapters show Lynn's character developing its own independent personality. Lynn also begins to explore a new deaf culture that neither her nor her parents have any experience.
   My fault with the book as that I feel it ends just as the story becomes interesting. The eighteen chapters of oralism, which are shocking and disturbing, are painful lesson in futility. An impatient reader would most certainly give up on the book after the seemingly thousands of failed attempts at oralism. The dedicated reader however, is rewarded with touching moments of a family that finds its `normalcy' through the common language of sign.

5 comments about The Boy Who Loved Windows: Opening The Heart And Mind Of A Child Threatened With Autism.

1. I have a 7 year old on the autism spectrum. There was much I could relate to, especially the logistic nightmares of having a kid that needs a lot more as well as having two younger siblings. The parents in the book are extremely devoted to the floortime program and also are very fortunate to receive a lot of help from various sources. I thought the book was a good intro to the principles of floortime.
   There is one complaint I have and it is the same that would go for a book like 'let me hear your voice' (ABA): It is the 'I went through hell and cured my kid and so could you if you were just working harder at it' mentality. For one - not every kid will respond to every or any treatment. Also - a kid or person does not have to be neurotypical to be loved and loving. I hate this genre of books where the writer never matures emotionally into being able to love their kid unconditionally. All love is put into changing or 'curring' the kid. In both books are segments where the writer looks at someone elses kid with autism and feels compelled to tell the parent that they need to work harder to change that kid and that it is not okay for your kid to sit there stimming or whatever. If you can only look at a person with a disability thinking that they are not okay and your love can only come in the form of wanting to change them, then you need to do some work on yourself ! I am not saying that you should not try treatments that will help but your love and life should not depend on them becoming neurotypical. If Walker would not have been one of the kids who were able to improve dramatically the writer would have lost her marriage and probably her sanity. She gambeled her life on curing her son and she won. But most people doing the same gamble will loose because it is a gamble and at the end of the day you better have some core strength and love for your kid and family to be okay if there is no cure.
   I don't consider her a role model. For a role model read a book like 'Elijah's cup'.



2. My son is on the autism spectrum. He sees an occupational therapist and speech therapist who have been trained in the Floortime approach used in this book. He also is in a therapeutic preschool program based on Floortime principles. These therapies have helped our son tremendously and, by extension, ehanced our family life.
   
   Based on my experience, it seems that the child in this book has a sensory processing disorder, rather than autism.
   
   The author is lucky that she caught it as early as she did. Most of us don't have the luxury of therapy starting when our children are 6 months old. In my son's case, we had Early Intervention services, but the therapists were inadequate. This author had a therapist who would stay three hours at a time, twice a week -- again, most of us don't have this luxury. The author also was able to ignore her other child to focus her energies on her affected child. For most of us, this is not possible.
   
   When reading autism memoirs, I've been annoyed because Applied Behavior Analysis is presented as "the only way". I'm glad that in this memoir, Floortime is getting some attention.



3. When we were frustrated with the lack of fun during the ABA sessions, and my child had a very hard time with them, I read this book where Mrs. Stacey share her experience with a much more flexible model of therapy for her son, this model worked for my child and he started to learn.
   I am from Brazil and I was no able to find a floortime therapist. I contacted Mrs.Stacey and she OFFERED to help me guiding me WITHOUT charging a dollar!
   Then we found a therapsi but I must say not only the book is wonderful but Mrs Stacey is a wonderful woman with a big heart, taking her time to answer emails from someone she does not know and offering free help!
   I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
   Simone.



4. This book gave us hope and helped us to deal with our emotional dificulties. When we first received the diagnosis we did not know anything about autism. When we had strict ABA my son only cried after reading this book we started seeking the floortime approach and also used VBA and my child started to learn having fun. Recovery is possible. It is a hard work and we are still working as hard as we can but we have seen the light coming. The book is like if Pat were my friend giving me support and hope whenever I need it.
   Thanks, Mrs. Stacey.



5. I bought this book because it had so many favorable reviews on this website. I've read approximately 25 books written by parents who have a child with ASD. This book is, by far, the worst I've read. I frequently found myself rolling my eyes while reading it.
   
   First of all, I firmly believe the mother is out of touch with reality. I wasn't surprised when, in the middle of her story, she writes that people were trying to get her to check into the local psychiatric ward. Her inability to spend time with her son and the rest of her family was unbelievable. She "weeped" when the REACH program wouldn't provide someone to take care of her son for most of his waking hours. The program supervisors told her time and again that her son did not need services - that he wasn't autistic!
   
   Second of all, her son was sensitive, not autistic! She didn't cure him of anything! Many babies like to look at windows because they like the color contrast. Many babies dislike a lot of noise. Her son, Walker, was pointing by his first birthday. He was talking like a pro by his second birthday. He was playing with other children, laughing, pretend playing, gesturing. Anyone who knows anything about ASD knows that these traits are commonly deficient in ASD children.
   
   As a parent of a child with ASD, I was irritated by her whole story. There are so many parents out there who really DO have children with ASD and we're doing everything we can to help them, including getting services through our local and state programs. To think that this author demanded so many resources from REACH, when they could have been given to a child who really DID have ASD is very sad. I really believe the author should change the subtitle of her book and remove the word "autism". Maybe she should have written - A child threatened by SENSITIVITY.