5 comments about Another Season: A Coach's Story of Raising an Exceptional Son.

1. As the father of a child with Down Syndrome I know firsthand what Gene Stallings has been through. It's both tough and rewarding. This book helps the reader get a glimpse of what being a parent to one of these wonderful people is about. If the reader has no experience being around people with Down Syndrome I hope that this story will help them fall in love with these remarkable folks. John Mark Stallings died a few weeks ago but he was a wonderful person and the love that his father expresses in this work is something to behold.



2. Knowing Johnny and Coach, this is a 'must read' for everyone to learn to appreciate life! A tremendous blessing!



3. I really enjoyed this book. A very moving story involving a father's love and football. You can't get any better than that! Great summer reading!



4. I live in alabama and even kind of like alabama football so when we had to read it for summer reading i thought i would like it...i absolutly hated it!!! You could so tell it wasn't written by a pro writer i mean it jumped around from different dates and although i loved how inspirational it was with johnny gene stallings seemed kind of self centered and every time the family was happy moved. i hated how there was no time line and years would pass and then he would go every minute of the next day. i thought it was good how they were so religous and i liked reading it but it is not a book i would really reccomend to anybody just because there are more inspirational books and just better books!! Luv Ya!!



5. There are a lot of great books out there you can read and be entertained in the process. A few of those books will even linger in your memory for awhile after you've finished them. It's more rare to read a book that really touches your heart and mind and provokes a change in your life.
   
   ANOTHER SEASON is one of those very extraordinary books that takes hold of the reader's attention in a powerful way that transcends language. It's certainly a great read--at times, even very enjoyable, as Coach Stallings describes various triumphs on the football field. But, at times, it's also painful, and painfully honest...maybe even gut-wrenching. One admires Coach Stallings for his candor and vulnerability; one envies the deep love between he and his son, John Mark.
   
   Through it all, we get a moving portrait of a caring, honorable, courageous family and get a glimpse into a father-son relationship that sets an example of what any father or son could hope for in terms of love, devotion, faithfulness, and friendship. John Mark Stallings is a heroic young man born with Down Syndrome. He has defied all odds, surviving and living with it, and touching millions of lives in the process. This young man has taught so many people how to live a life filled with meaning, purpose, and love, just like his famous daddy.
   
   This story is personal to me in many ways: I have a close relative who has lived with a particular developmental challenge ever since her birth, and we love her dearly--she adds great richness to our family, despite her difficulties. It's also personal to me because I am a life-long Alabama Crimson Tide football fan, and I lived in Alabama during that glorious 1992-1993 National Championship season. I can tell you that everybody in our state, no matter what football team they followed, was and is a big fan of Mr. John Mark Stallings.
   
   RECOMMENDATION: I cannot say enough good about this book. It will appeal to a broad range of readership; certainly, football fans will enjoy it, but also families and friends who have faced similar challenges as the Stallings family has will find much encouragement and inspiration here. John Mark, you're our hero. We love you, buddy. God bless the Stallings family, and thanks, Coach, for this deeply moving book.

5 comments about Dean and Me: (A Love Story).

1. Good book, I enjoyed it. Jerry Lewis wrote of alot of personal experiences that I had never heard of before. I read it in a few days, was very interesting.



2. I have the Audible version and have to say it again...WOW.
   
   This is one one heck of a memoir/bio delivered by the only person that could deliver it in such great detail and depth...Jerry Lewis himself.
   
   I am way too young to have known or viewed their comedy "act", but this book brings it all to life so vividly that I am on my second listen just so I didn't miss anything on the first listen and also it was really just a great story.
   
   I went ahead right away and purchased "DINO" by Nick Tosces so I can continue to learn about everything that occured in that era including the Rat Pack.
   
   I was very surprised that the book was so well written. To be honest, I only bought the audio because I had a credit towards a book and I figured "what the heck". Now I'm wondering what took me so long.



3. Amazing book. I love Dean and Jerry, and couldn't put this down. I literally laughed and cried. This was a very enjoyable book.



4. This was an excellent book. I learned so much about Martin & Lewis. Having grown up watching Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin movies I loved being able to find out more about my favorite actors. But I can't help but walk away from this book feeling a sense of sadness and heartbreak. They had such an awesome partnership, and like Jerry says, "all good things must come to an end". Sometimes it's harder for the fans to deal with the reality than the ones who are involved. They are what I would consider TRUE ENTERTAINERS. I never knew how much Jerry loved Dean...he really did so much for him just to see him happy.



5. With candid portrayal of his start and 10 year "gig" with Dean Martin, Jerry Lewis captivates us and we can't put the book down. This is no white wash flowery story; he tells the imperfections of both of them. You know it's love, even after their breakup of the team because Jerry reveals allot about his partner Dean Martin that we never knew of.
   
   In short the Jew did good. Jerry always wanted to mix comedy with tears. Dean didn't like the sad mixing stuff; just make 'em laugh. However Jerry got his last wish with Dean, 'cause in the end of the book the clown made a full grown man cry. Jerry instead of making me laugh, at the end, warmed my heart about his love for his partner and made me grab a tissue. That was low pool Jerry.

5 comments about Dan Rooney: My 75 Years With the Pittsburgh Steelers and the NFL.

1. This is a very good book, but I did not appreciate the black magic marker mark on the bottom part of the book. It made it look like that book was retrieved from the garbage pile at the printers.
   
   The book provides a very good history of the Rooney family and the Steelers.



2. There are few people who have been around for virtually the entire history of the NFL. Dan Rooney is the last survivor of the day when men who could think past the end of their own bank account ran the league. His stories about how his father and men like Wellington Mara and George Halas made the NFL are worth the time even for non-Steeler fans. Should be a mandatory read for Jerry Jones and Dan Synder.



3. Excellent history of the Pittsburgh Steelers especially now that there is talk of the Steelers possibly being sold. A wonderful family governed by Art Sr. A must read for Steeler fans and those who appreciate history of the NFL.



4. This book is an easy read. My husband, who is not much of a reader, however is a HUGE Pittsburg Steelers fan. I bought him this book for Christmas and he read it within 2 days. It was surely an easy read and quite humorous. There are several interesting stories shared, which allows you to peek in the life of Dan Rooney.



5. As a lifelong Steeler fan, this was a must-read, a tome that belongs on my bookshelf along with "Doing it Right" by Jim O'Brien. Mr. Rooney's accounting of history is first-hand and basically unscrubbed. He talks about the things he, his father, and the Steeler staff did right over the years, and the things they did wrong (e.g., Unitas, Marino). He tells you who are the good guys and the troublemakers. He takes you from the earliest beginnings of the NFL on through to the hiring of Mike Tomlin. It's a little tricky to follow chronologically because he gets off-topic and rambles now and then (I found myself thinking "wait a minute, that's not... what year was this supposed to be?). And there are some outright errors, which are mentioned in other reviews. The style is very (very!) homey, as you would expect, with an almost turn-of-the-century charm throughout. But in the end, you believe that Dan Rooney really is that sincere and genuine, and schmaltzy, and that's why so many people love him. Come to think of it, who doesn't like Dan Rooney? (Sorry, I haven't read Al Davis' book).

5 comments about Girls of Tender Age: A Memoir.

1. I enjoy reading memoirs- idk why, I just do. So, at the first chance I read Girls of Tender Age. The first half of the book was a memoir of Tirone-Smith's childhood in a silent house- her older brother, Tyler,was autistic and could not stand noise of any kind- laughing, crying, and dog barking, to name a few. If Tyler heard such noises, he would knaw at his arm. We also are told of Tirone-Smith's family history, which is quite interesting, as well as a background of a killer. The second half consists of Tirone-Smith's attempt to recall, make sense of, and write about a murder that occured when Tirone-Smith was 10. Her classmate, Irene, was strangled to death with her own scarf. Despite what the bookcover says, Irene is not Tirone-Smith's neighbor or even friend. She was only a quiet classmate, and the book falls apart after her murder. I was disapointed, because up to that point I had been throughly enjoying it. It became quite uncomprehensible.



2. No one locked their doors. Few mothers drove cars. Kids walked to school, church, and the neighborhood grocery, and played under street lights at dusk. On the surface, Mary-Ann Tirone Smith's 1950's childhood was idyllic. But scratch that surface, and it quickly becomes apparent that nothing could be further from the truth. First, there was her remote mother, always on the verge of the then fashionable nervous breakdown. Then, her older brother, a manipulative, tyrannical child who never received an education or treatment because no one knew quite what was wrong with him. Mary Ann's first ten years were spent doing normal childhood activities but walking on eggshells and suppressing her own needs at home. Her description of American culture in that post war era are priceless, and she does it with humor, touches of sarcasm, and dead-on accuracy.
   
   Then, all at once. on the day of the 5th grade field trip to the electric company, a classmate of Mary-Ann is brutally murdered by a pedophile. True to the times, no one discusses the tragedy, and the kids are left to wonder about every facet of that terrifying crime. And to cope with its psychological consequences entirely on their own.
   
   Ms Tirone Smith wrote this memoir as a memorial to her friend, having summoned the courage to face the grief and the issues she had buried for decades. She traces the course of the apprehension, trial, and punishment of the killer in clinical detail. And she has succeeded nobly, writing with grace and distinction. Readers of Girls of Tender Age will long remember theheartbreaking story of little Irene with the "Loretta Young eyes."



3. just finished this book. i liked it very much. it was touching, funny, sad, tragic and a lot more. Well written. would recommend it.



4. I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Even though it was a very sad but true story it was choreographed perfectly. I couldn't put it down. Having grown up in Hartford, Ct. I was very familiar with the setting of the book. It enabled me to really place myself in their footsteps and know the surroundings, without trying to create a picture them in my mind.



5. I had a hard time putting this book down. I was sorry when the book ended. Mary-Ann developed all the people in her book very well that you felt by reading it they were part of your own family..and if not family member someone that that you knew a lot about. I thought this book was very good on many levels. Thank you for writing such a powerful memoir. Barb :)

5 comments about Appetites: Why Women Want.

1. Although Caroline Knapp is no longer with us, her contributions to the understanding of women's appetites live on in this book. Her amazing insight, powerful language, and personal experiences shed light on the unexplored domains of female hunger and desire. The book explores women's tragic quest of attempting to satisfy deeply internal desires by reaching for external and unattainable "fragments of hope that always promise transcendence over pain and longing and always disappoint." Feeling fundamentally incomplete, many women become trapped in an eternal loop of hunger, and repeatedly attempt to fill the voids in ways that only increase the appetite and longing. As Caroline beautifully expressed, the hunger that truly needs to be attended to is the "most central hunger, which is the desire to be recognized, to be known and loved because of, and in spite of, who you are."



2. I read this book as part of a feminist psychology class and I LOVED it. It is so enlightening and revealing.
   
   It is about anorexia, but as a reader you often forget this because it-- unlike most books on eating disorders-- focuses on the psychology of women and how society impacts women's desires and sense of entitlement.
   
   I DEFINATELY recommend reading this book... there is no doubt that it will change the way you think about your wants and needs and make you question what society has been telling and teaching you all your life.



3. Overall a great book if you don't want a completely factual account of women and dieting. It can be self-indulgent, ego-centric, and sprawling but the author's personality is likable and sympathetic so I enjoyed learning about the more personal side to this. There are other more factual books I would reccomend, though, like Women and Dieting Culture: Inside a Commercial Weight Loss Group or Hunger: An Unnatural History.
   But good book overall and I'd reccomend it.



4. Alice Walker once wrote, "Art unfailingly reflects its creator's heart. Art . . . comes from a heart open to all the possible paths there might be to a healthier tomorrow." Caroline Knapp's artistry was in writing and publishing her internal dialogues. This book appears to reveal her heart, a heart that was open to considering new and different possible paths to a healthier tomorrow. She may not have had all the solutions to the issues she raised in her excellent book, but I admire her tremendous courage to express her frustrations clearly and to think aloud to try and understand the motivations and causes for her behaviors. She expressed her best estimates of how she might improve her circumstances. This book is an excellent look at one [...] woman's cognitive thought processes about why she thought she was the way she was, and how she thought she might overcome her perceived problems. Whether you agree with her or not as to the causes of her issues and their possible solutions, if you read this book, you will learn something very valuable about the strong, and sometimes controlling, reasoning processes that likely flow through many women.
   
   Throughout this book (and her books 'Pack of Two' and 'The Merry Recluse') she discusses her difficulties with communicating with her mother, her father, her significant others, professors and people in general. She discusses how she did not believe that her parents communicated well with each other in key areas. She watched her mother silently accept roles that she was not certain her mother should accept. She saw her mother accept treatment from her father that she thought her mother should have responded to differently.
   
   When a woman chooses to attach her soul to another person's soul, and also agrees to "be silent to" or condone parts of the other person's philosophies or actions she believes to be in error - that prolonged, and potentially neverending, acquiescence can negatively effect her psyche. That degree of unceasing internal mental contradiction in major areas may manifest itself in either serious mental dysfunctions or physical ailments.
   
   It is more healthy for a woman to express her objections, even if those objections are not addressed and remain outstanding, than to be silent. Women must overcome any discouragement they receive from their family, friends, and significant others, discouraging them from expressing the ideas they think may lead to possible solutions. They should not always defer to the people closest to them because women often have the best access to the most accurate information about themselves. And even when their suggested solutions may not be better than the current course, when they raise their objections, it gives their community notice of issues that likely deserve alternate responses and further reconsideration.
   
   Thank you Ms. Knapp, not because you had all the right answers, but because you set a great example of a woman fighting resiliently to help herself and others, even when that self-examination was revealing and sometimes humbling. Even when she could not find sufficient motivations for herself, she worked toward and wanted other women to pursue their fulfilments and desires, and to become satiated. She wanted to stop the cycle of mothers unknowingly passing on negative patterns to their daughters. Caroline's voice was heard and I will always remember it.



5. I got so much out of Knapp's book on alcoholism, I foolishly assumed this would be enlightening as well. She seems determined to prove that every woman in America has issues. If you diet, for whatever reason, you have issues. If you eat what you like, you have issues. If you're vegetarian. If you eat junk food. If you work out. If you hate how you look in a bikini. If you LIKE how you look in a bikini. For god's sake, food is just one part of life. And there are actually women who do not have body issues!
   
   I'm currently trying to get in shape (note my phrasing there), and I'd thought this would motivate me. What was I thinking. I can just see Knapp, were she alive, questioning me about my diet and exercise, and then her comments afterwards. "She eats a quarter cup of M&M's a day...Yes, she told me that she read the nutritional info on the packate, but SEE? We're all slaves to the FDA and the LIES they cram down our throat! She's AFRAID to go for it and just take a handful of M&Ms and be FREEEEEEE!" Except that eating like that is how I got out of shape, and then it would be, "Oh, she doesn't like her body, because Vogue tells her she has to disappear when she turns sideways!"

5 comments about Obama - The Postmodern Coup: Making of a Manchurian Candidate.

1. Tired of the fake, controlled, contrived taking points both for and against Obama in the corporate media? Check this book out. Even if you disagree with everything the author says in the book, you'll still have a whole new perspective on this thanks to Tarpley.



2. First, let me begin by saying that I am no supporter of Barack Obama and believe that his election as president would be a colossal disaster. However, if I am to be fair minded I have to judge Tarpley's OBAMA-THE POSTMODERN COUP with the same objectivity that I would if he had for example published his book using MCCAIN instead of OBAMA in the title. I have no objection to any book written as a polemic. Indeed I have written numerous favorable reviews of polemics, but in those cases, each polemic that I praised was grounded in fact and backed by credible documentary evidence. Make no mistake. Tarpley's book is not much more than flimsy charges tinged with guilt by association. It is true that Barack Obama is a political lightweight but it ought to be up to the American voters to decide their ballots based on the facts, and in this case the facts that call into question Barack Obama's competency have been thoroughly documented elsewhere to such an extent that there is no need to indulge in the sort of conspiracies in Tarpley to derail Obama's quest for the White House. I shall not rehash here the Trilateral Commision brouhaha nor the Zbigniew Brezhinski controversy since neither is referenced by reliable footnotes. What emerges then from Tarpley is that the "coup" of the title exists only on the fringes of a discourse that is neither rational nor convincing. The left has no monopoly of character assassins.



3. Veteran author, columnist and GCN live radio host Webster Tarpley lays bare the tentacled arm of the insane Zbigniew Brzezinski and his main mouthpiece and puppet Obama.
   Tarpley outlines the crafting of this Manchurian candidate and the seriously apocalyptic vision that Obama will be used to fulfill culminating in WW3 with Russia.
   Look out for his new 'unauthorized biography on Obama' coming soon!



4. This book shows the hidden side of Saint Obama, and the crazed neocon/fascist agenda of those who puppeteer him. If anyone thinks either candidate for office is going to be any different than what we have, they haven't read enough.
   Webster hits the ball out of the park with this one.
   America DIED 11/22/63 and the same agenda is still going on....today it looks like war with Russia is back on target which should make Brezinski very happy.



5. I couldn't put it down. I learned alot. I had questions about a lot of things and independently did my own fact checking. and it all checked out. His conclusions seemed a bit out there, but the more you read and think about it and check it out, the more it seems to be spot on. Definitely worth the time and money.

5 comments about Cry of the Kalahari.

1. I had to read this book for an AP Biology course and it was absolutely amazing!!! The way that they describe these encounters is simply amazing. Great Book easy to follow it's a book that you just don't want to put down until you finish it. I give it 5 stars no doubt I highly recommend this book to all. One the greatest books i've ever read.



2. I found "Cry of the Kalahari" purely by change at the San Diego Zoo and bought a copy after reading the glowing reviews that were on the back of the book. I enthusiastically agree with the praise and plan to read their other books. In fact, I dropped the book I was currently reading in order to finish this one. I was immediately attracted to the story of two young Americans arriving in Africa with modest funds but determined to do research not previously attempted. The story is all-the-more compelling given the fact that they were going into an area that people tended to shun as too remove and not even slightly hospitable.
   
   Mark and Delia Owens write incredibly well and do not waste words. They describe the animals, people and places with phrases that bring them to life.
   
   A sample picked a random:
   
   "A near total silence crept in on me when I opened my eyes and gazed at the Land Rover ceiling. A moment's confusion; where was I? I turned to the window. A gnarled acacia tree loomed outside, its limbs held up in silhouette against the grey sky. Beyond the tree, in soft easy lines, the wooded sand dunes descended to the riverbed. Morning, our first in Deception Valley, grew in the sky far beyond the dunes."
   
   One could cite many examples that stimulate interest and draw the reader into the experience of Mark and Delia as the alternate the telling of the work. Also the values held by the authors that they will leave as little a footprint as possible is one shared by those serious about conservation, so we share in their decision and agonize with them when they have to make a tough decision. When the lioness called Bones shows so badly wounded with porcupine quills I found myself cheering the Owens' on as they made the decision to lend some needed medical help rather than let her die. Perhaps interfering with nature but the authors are careful not to impose their presence when animals were hunting unless they were protecting an animal they had darted.
   
   Some readers may disagree with the close proximity Mark and Delia Owens have with some of the animals, and the "cute" names they give to some of the animals, but unlike some wildlife proponents the Owens' are allowing the animals to be curious about them and do not seek to befriend wild animals. They are not trying to prove that wild animals are safe and (although there are some tense moments when Mark seems to be getting too close for safety) the authors often retreat to their Land Rover.
   
   Beautifully written and illustrated with many black and white photographs, "Cry of the Kalahari" is a remarkable book



3. Wonderful book that enables one to live the experiences of this dedicated couple who gave so much to the animals of Africa through their research. This book tore at my heartstrings and made me even more excited about my upcoming trip to Africa.



4. Two grad students, having married shortly after their University of Georgia college education began their graduate studies in zoology in the Kalahari desert in Botswana. I've heard grad students' lives are poor and hard, but this couples' 7 year field study takes the mealie-meal. They carefully rationed water and gasoline and lived on mealie-meal (cornmeal), ostrich eggs, and antelope meat; they'd nearly run out of money and write grants to pay for their supplies only and with no money left to fly home. They survived on these paltry sums and did their research in temperatures that sometimes got as high as 120 degrees Fahrenheit surrounded by lions, leopards, and cheetahs in the midst of one of Africa's most inhospitable areas.
   
   This true story is truly amazing and I can't wait to read their other books about Africa. The book was published in 1984 and I wonder if their research had any influence in the IMAX film The Serengeti which is about the greatest wildebeest migration that happens in the Serengeti area in Tanzania and Kenya. In the back of the book is a brief recommendation for wildlife management in the Kalahari desert. In reading this, one can't but be reminded of Jane Gooddall's and the Adamson's work with wildlife in East Africa. It's also a survivors' tale, adventuresome and exciting, but most of all great research. Excellent all around!



5. I do not wish to write a review, other than to say I read this book many years ago and it has stayed with me. Mark and Delia's story was fascinating and I was enthralled with their descriptions of the Kalahari and the animals they observed. I wanted to rate this book, so that the rating could be used in making future recommendatipons for me.

5 comments about If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name: News from Small-Town Alaska.

1. I lived for several years in Alaska and my wife thought I would enjoy this book, which she got through Paperback Swap. I read the book during a recent illness and only finished it because I felt I had to, not because there was any epiphany to be gained in the last few pages. I realized this early-on, but kept reading only to learn more of the well-described and interesting people that are part of Lende's social circle. Alaska seems to bring out the best some of its citizens- and I have known some really funky and admirable Alaskans. A story about them or folks like them would have been a better goal for Lende. She has the talent to pull-it-off and she certainly has the presence of mind to jot-down relevant comments made by others. Her recollection of quotes and comments borders on the spooky. I wonder if her friends will ever be so frank again. Her ability to use quotes to capture a "life" is exceptional.
   
   This book could have been edited better. A good editor would have guided Lende in a more cohesive arrangement of her content to support any one of the supposed goals of the book: a narrative about death as it shapes how we view life, a first-hand account of life in small-town Alaska, a collection of profiles of Alaskans, how marriage is shaped by life's experiences and challenges, the development of the conflict between her secular (permissive) view of social freedom and the role of prayer and religion in her life, how liberal or conservative views shape a culture or a small community in the face of modern challenges, or a narrative that explores gritty details of life from the feminine (or maybe liberal) perspective. Any of these goals would have been admirable, but not all at once. A good editor would have made her choose, and fully develop it. What she created was a collection of disjointed vignettes, with a heavy overlay of first person. It is readable and fun, but not a very important literary achievement.
   
   Her technique of using the Duly Notes column as a launching pad for each chapter was interesting, but not very helpful to the reader, since those details were not further developed by the examples in the following chapter. Further, the digressions placed in the middle of her profile-obituaries seemed like more of a distraction rather than a technique to introduce or bolster some larger meaning. Heather Lende's story about Haines is really a first-person memoir. All the vignettes, obituaries, and profiles seem to provide some direct reflection on Lende or her family, or seem to be used to validate her own social or political viewpoints. So it is not as much about Haines as it is about Lende's perception of how Haines reflects on her life. A true narrative about Alaskan life would have less first person pronouns in it. Her view of Haines is one from privilege; though it is endearing to read her self-critical commentary during her visit to the trailer of a native (in her Patagonia jacket) it falls short for the very effort she uses to convince us that she is trying to understand. Sensitivity towards modesty would have prevented her from dropping "elite" details of her life that set her apart from the mainstream. Those very details betray her motive.
   
   As other reviewers have mentioned, her version of Haines, and of small town life in general, is one of a well-healed community leader in one of the best places to live if your are a millionaire. But not everybody there will be a millionaire - we can expect a full-on pluralistic society. I imagine few folks in Haines have the resources to be flying in and out of Alaska as often as she does - even if you stretch all those trips over 15 years. Her story might make me want to visit Haines again, but what would I find? A town of "haves" and "have nots" So this book is a "teaser" in many ways. It trades the neutral excellence of a John McPhee with first person impressions of a narrator that gives us just enough of her opinion and emotion to betray her own credibility. You want a piece of Heather's Haines, but you'll never get it because you can't afford it.
   
   I recommend others read this book, but not because it will give them some Alaskan Lake Wobegon fix. Read this book to get a voyeur's glimpse of what small towns look like from an ivory tower viewpoint. Just don't be teased into believing it is possible to have it yourself.
   
   M.A.'s husband, Chris



2. Heather Lende is a freelance writer, commentator for National Public Radio, and obituary writer for the Chilkat Valley News in Haines, Alaska. "If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name" is a portrait of life in Haines--a small isolated Southeast Alaska town dominated by awe-inspiring wildlife, majestic mountains, and 1,800 people (give or take) who manage to tenaciously hold onto their rugged individuality yet know when to set their individuality aside for the sake of greater goods (e.g. families in need of assistance, strong relationships with neighbors).
   
   Lende writes from a first person perspective and thus Haines life is told from her idiosyncratic point of view. Many anecdotes revolve around Lende's vocations of stay-at-home-mother, school board member, member of the local Episcopal church, environmentally-conscious citizen, and (especially) obituary writer. As she presents Haines life from these angles, she often juxtaposes the complex emotions surrounding Haines. She presents examples of the breathtaking beauty of her town, but then tells the story of how their son almost died of appendicitis as they raced through a blizzard to a Canadian hospital. She writes about her divisive attempt to institute a mandatory gay sensitivity workshop at the local high school, but then writes about the unity she experienced with one of her most bitter rivals as they cooked a benefit meal together to help defray the medical bills of another town resident. She effectively shows that life in Haines, Alaska, is as complex as life anywhere.
   
   A major theme running through "If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name" is death--or to be more accurate, the cycle of life. This should not be surprising since one of Lende's vocations is that of obituary writer (and every Haines death gets a full treatment). Writing about "good deaths" for people who lived life fully to a ripe, old age is easy; writing about a twenty-year-old who drowns when his fishing boat sank isn't nearly as easy; why? Each death is totally unique; each death fits the pattern of life-and-death that had been established since the world began; how is this reconciled? And then, how do the related issues of birth, ageing, growing, loving, and how one spends his life come into play? Lende manages to be poetically reflective even while she avoids the temptation of being simplistic about death. She allows it to be mysterious, fearsome, natural, and expectedly complex. Even still, her last chapter, "I Am Not Resigned" surprisingly ties up a lot of running themes and brings a feeling of completion without presenting "solutions."
   
   In my reviews, I try to present both positive and negative aspects of any book. For this book, Lende's memoirs, it is difficult to condemn her life experience. I never get the sense that Lende is being less than totally truthful (even when she portrays herself in a bad light). This reader appreciates her honesty, even to the point of admitting that those on different sides of various "issues" have valid points. Being one on the other side of these various issues, I do have trouble identifying with Lende at times. Crying, she comforts herself by imagining a future in which a homosexual from Haines becomes President of the United States; when writing an obituary of a Tlingit, she is overcome by "white guilt" because of what all the "people who look like her" have done to American Indians; she indulges in religious pluralism as she is a leader of her Episcopal church, seems to believe Tlingit creation stories, writes laudably about a wedding in which the "eternal spirits of the universe" are invoked, writes equally highly about a totally secular wedding, and experiences the joy of praying the Rosary. With all of these, this reader and Lende are so far apart, that I simply can't put myself in her shoes and say, "I understand what you're feeling, even if I disagree."
   
   However, as previously mentioned, this is Lende's life experience and it is well told. I was fascinated as she mused on life during the winter months (where the sun doesn't rise until 9:30 and sets by 3:00!) and summer months (where the sun stays out well past midnight!). Her relating tales on the process of smoking fish, picking wild berries, raising chickens, cooking meals for thirty from scratch, and the like are fascinating. She succeeds in getting this reader to envision what living in Haines would be like...and in fact envy the people of Haines (until I remember the lack of hospitals and winter sun). In all, this book is highly recommended as it provides a great balance of enjoyment and forces to the reader to contemplate things common to us all--life, death, family, vocation, and what's really important.



3. Though I enjoyed reading about Haines and parts of this author's life, the preoccupation with death throughout this book was overwhelming. Death of relatives, strangers, friends, animals. Accidental death. Death by falling, by weather, by cancer, by boats sinking, by airplanes crashing. Fear of death. Near death. Funerals. Researching and writing obituaries. Anniversaries of loved ones dying. Even when it seems a chapter is going to be about a different subject, within a few pages it seems like death always sneaks in there.
   
   I'd like to see another book by this author, this time devoted to life and living, instead of death and dying.



4. I have been wanting to move to Alaska for about 15 years but my family won't come with me, so after the kids are through college and I have put in 20 years on my job, (I have 7 years to go) Haines, AK, here I come. During the past 15 years I have been reading about different towns in Alaska and there is always something that turns me off. Not one thing about Lende's descriptions about life in Haines has turned me off. I am sure this is the place for me. I am going to take a road trip in the summer of 2008 to Alaska and will definately spend time in Haines. I can't wait. One thing for sure, I won't be getting on any planes there until I am ready to go meet my maker.



5. Heather Lende writes the social column and obituaries for the small town paper in Haines, Alaska. You get to feel you know all of the residents there through her eyes and the columns she tells about that she has written. A book well worth reading. It will show you the joys and sorrows of a small town in Alaska and help you appreciate that small town where you may have grown up any where else.

5 comments about Wife No. 19.

1. Ann Eliza Young was a 19th century LDS woman who was born into the second generation of Mormon polygamy. One of the most heart-wrenching parts of the book recounts how her mother heartbrokenly went from being her father's only wife for years before polygamy was introduced, to being only one of his wives, after church leaders pushed polygamy on their congregation.
   
   Mrs. Young (she was married to Brigham Young himself) finally decided to escape and speak out against the polygamist lifestyle she and so many other women in her community found devastating. Although the book was written well over a century ago, it exposes many of the same problems as contemporary polygamy memoirs (such as Escape, Shattered Dreams and His Favorite Wife, all of which I recommend). These are:
   
   1. The lower status of women in polygamist society;
   
   2. Men (even wealthy men) who do not provide financially for their huge plural families;
   
   3. Lack of education, and children pressured to quit school early and work to support and care for their father's plural families;
   
   4. Pressure on women to marry against their will;
   
   5. Physically and/or emotionally abusive behavior of husbands whose religion and community give them total power over their wives;
   
   6. Husbands who dote on favorite wives while neglecting the others;
   
   7. Unhappy households that feature intense jealousy and competition among plural wives;
   
   8. Most of all, the profound and lasting pain felt by good, loving women whose religion and community compel them to share their husbands (they are told there is no way to heaven except through polygamy).
   
   This is an excellent primary source about early Mormonism in general (it contains a first-generation family narrative that describes the church's history) and polygamy in particular. Highly recommended to anyone interested in either subject.



2. I just ordered this book to add to my shelf of primary source materials of nineteenth century Mormon polygamy. It is a classic work. Ann Young made alot of money off of this book, as did she touring the united states on the same pulpit. For that it deserves five stars. It had a profound effect upon how non-Mormon AMericans perceived Utah Mormons. With that said, i was disappointed to see so many reviews tout this as "true" or valuable history in and of itself. Such reviewers need to step back and take some courses in both AMerican history and critical thinking and theory. You read this book to know what nineteenth-century Americans were being told about Utah polygamy, not as accurate history of what really happened. Such is identical and equally intellectually naive and embarrassing as saying Maria Monk's expose (written in the 1830s) of catholic convents was also true history. For literature on the historical placements of such nineteenth century novels and exposes see Terryl Givens, Viper on the Hearth; Sarah Gordon, The Mormon Question; Ann Douglass, The Feminization of American culture, and Franchot, Roads to Rome.



3. If I ever had any warm and fuzzy feelings about the Mormon Church and especially its founders and early disciples, this very credible eyewitness account sent those feelings into the dustbin of history.
   
   Though the writing is not perfect by today's standards, Ann Eliza Young's personal story is very believable (I believe it is authentic) and yet incomprehensible (I am astounded that so many people put up with the religion she describes) at the same time.
   
   This is the quite detailed personal memoir of a girl who grew up in a Mormon family and became the 19th polygamous wife of Brigham Young. She finally became so disillusioned that she took the very dangerous and rare step of leaving him and divorcing him. Even more astounding for her day and age, she went on the lecture tour and exposed the Mormons and polygamy for what it was (from her point of view at least).
   
   Anybody looking for details of the sex lives of polygamous spouses will be disappointed, as there is no information on that matter whatsoever. (At the very end of the book she hints that there were gross injustices and humiliations of a personal and private nature that she would not reveal.)
   
   I enjoyed reading the book though I was appalled at the story it told. Any student of the history of the Latter-day Saints should read this book. I bet it isn't to be found in the bookstore of Brigham Young University.



4. Ann Eliza was brave to leave and expose what she lived and witnessed. Ann takes you into the world of polygamy and you live it with her. Many women were victims to the abusive "highest principle" of the Mormon faith.
   
   I have trouble reading some of the negative reviews from people calling this victim "disgruntled" or expecting too much from her marriage. Here is a woman who was born & raised in a polygamous family and indoctrinated into a religion that teaches she will be damned to hell if she leaves the church, but is brave enough to escape, risking her life.
   
   How sad that a victim of religious coerced polygamy has her story labeled as fiction and lies by some reviewers. Would these same mainstream LDS label women who leave the FLDS church (Fundamentalist Mormons) TODAY the same way?
   
   What I found fascinating was her steadfast faith in God, despite the indoctrination she was forced to deprogram herself from. She spent the rest of her life educating the public about the horrors of living in the culture of 19th century Mormon polygamy.
   
   I did notice some of her accounts of Joseph Smith were not precisely correct with other accounts I read in polygamy books but she is telling the story in her own words. She was not a historian and some of her accounts were from her mother's memory so they may not be perfectly accurate.
   
   This is not a book for exact historical dates or statements but an excellent book for what polygamy was really like for the women behind closed doors. The messages they gave in public forums were for the church and encouraged by the leaders. Having a first hand account of living "the principle" in 19th century Mormonism makes this book very unique.
   
   I highly recommend the books "Mormon Polygamy" by Richard Van Wagoner or "In Sacred Loneliness" by Todd Compton for excellent research/history of Mormon Polygamy.



5. This is an amazing book about the founders of a new faith in a new world. It's no wonder that the Mormon church tried to destroy these. My mother found a first edition copy of this book at an estate sale, and so we bought it here because we were afraid to read the old one (it might fall apart). It's a well told story by a brave woman who speaks with clarity and force about the beginnings of the Mormon church in Utah.

   Mormons will not like this book. Non-mormons with open minds probably will.

5 comments about Downtown: My Manhattan.

1. 
   Hamill's love for Downtown Manhattan is obvious. He speaks lovingly of "a city of daily irritations, occasional horrors, hourly tests of will and even courage, and huge dollops of pure beauty. He fills the book with tales of Peter Stuyvesant and John Jacob Astor, CBGB's and Delmonico's, but in the midst of this history, personal reminiscences are tossed in carelessly and this technique creates a schism in the narrative. It breaks the natural flow of his writing, which when on target create wonderful pictures of the Downtown that was. It's almost as if Hamill couldn't decide whether he was writing; history or memoir. I'm sure with careful consideration of approach this could have worked, but here style seems to be an afterthought, surprising for a newspaperman. Worth reading for his portraits of Old New York, but skip over the words when Hamill injects himself into the mix.



2. My attraction to this book was unexpected. As I got into it I became helpless to stop reading.
   
   To reveal too much would be a kind of sin. You must read for yourself. You'll learn, you will chuckle, cry and, I promise, the historical facts will amaze you at times. The history of New York is the history of our country, and our known history goes back only so many years. Just looking at some of the buildings, the architecture, the streets, will bring old stories to life. As a native New Yorker, Pete Hamill has lived his life as journalist and reporter, soaking up the flavor and moods of the city. He has been editor in chief of the New York Post and the New York Daily News, as well as author of numerous books and many articles and stories for other distinguished publications.
   
   New York IS history - and I think New York is Pete Hamill - and the natives live with it as they breathe. Pete Hamill will surprise and delight you, sharing his life and style while gently informing.
   
   Coming to the end of this book is like having to say a reluctant goodby.



3. During Pete Hamill's lifetime, he has lived mostly in Manhattan which is usually the priciest and most expensive borough in the city. I live in New Jersey which is considered the poor sibling to the most exciting city in the world. Pete's right about writing about how much the twin towers' presence is missed alright. Where I live about thirty miles south of the city, you could have seen the twin towers. My grandfather's home was right across Manhattan where you could have seen the New York City skyline. He passed away before September 11, 2001. Every time I drive to Jersey City for school, I see the skyline without the twin towers and it's heartbreaking. It's just not the same without them there. Even though I didn't lose somebody I know, we all know people that did or survived the disaster with horrifying memories. Hamill's cynical but New York cynical, he writes about a city he loves so much, warts and all. Of course, most people just can't afford to live in New York City or they would not have moved away to the suburbs. People don't choose to run away from the city, they just have too because it's just expensive. Nobody unless you make six figures can afford to live decently in Manhattan or most of the five boroughs. The Village is not the same anymore since it has become so fashionable not just for gay couples but for straight couples with children. According to the times, the West Village has become family friendly. The East Village is following suit in becoming expensive and gentrified. It's all about money, who has it and doesn't that determines who gets to live there. Even Harlem has become gentrified like the rest of the city. Hamill doesn't talk much about the celebrity invasion that has determined who gets to live in the greatest city in the world. I love Manhattan! Would I live there? I don't know but it's got the best restaurants in the world, the best shopping, and the best sight-seeing of celebrities. In New York City, I feel so alive but it's still so expensive for the artists' population. Where do the artists like writers, artists, actors, and actresses go? The Village is no longer the place unless you're successful in your career. I wished the city well in the future and Hamill too. After September 11, 2001, there was a line in my church for confession which there never was or has been since. Many of the victims of 09-11-01 lived in New Jersey too. Commuters to New York City make up a lot of the foot traffic and business but they also contribute by spending the time to commute which can be difficult to do. If you want to see something in New York City, you should go to Penn or Grand Central Station and watch the commuters around rush hour. You'll see thousands of people waiting to find out which track their train is on and rush to get on board. I think of those stations as a place where I most likely run into people I know. New York City's great to visit, work, and even live if possible. I beg that the twin towers be rebuild but stronger because it's just not the same city anymore. I remember when I was in Warsaw where almost the entire city was destroyed about 90 percent I believe from World War II. After the war, the Poles rebuilt the city best as it was before the war and even added some Russian influence from the Soviet Communism. New York City should be rebuild those twin towers to make them stronger as well. There too busy concentrating on contracts and politics rather than remembering those lost their lives. If only, New Yorkers would stand up and demand the twin towers to be rebuilt and a memorial to honor those who were killed on that fateful day. By not rebuilding the twin towers, they are only cowering to the terrorists themselves.



4. being an ex-NYer and having been changed forever by the years I lived there this book was a whirlwind tour through my favorite city. Pete Hamill knows his history and takes you through the history of buildings, people and the vibrant city that it's always been. Parsing bits of his own life with the life of the city it's like being on personal guided tour by one of NY's finest writers. My only problem was it was too short, I wanted to read more.



5. Mr. Hamill takes on every bit of New York and discusses why he loves even the worst parts of it. He crafts a walk downtown thru the 1800's past buildings and men who shaped this city and produces a novel that inspires.